


Second Hopes

by ABlackRaven



Series: Kairosclerosis Trilogy [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Anime, Band, LGBT, Love, M/M, Ship, highschoolAU, modernau
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-12
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-05 19:32:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 36
Words: 39,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14625537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABlackRaven/pseuds/ABlackRaven
Summary: Sasunaru/Narusasu modern au story. Naruto moves to a new school with his adoptive father Iruka, hoping to escape the bullying at his old school. There are bullies at every school though. But here he is also part of the band, part of a family. And when he meets Sasuke, both of their lives change.Coauthor-KonkyattoWarning: will include bullying and self harm.(Posted here, Fanfiction Net, and Wattpad)





	1. Chapter 1

Prologue  
Naruto stared at the last few boxes, wishing they would just be gone already. Part of him was excited they had finally made the move, and there wasn’t much left to unpack now. But there was still some things left to unpack, and he hated unpacking.  
A light knock cam on the door, Iruka. Dad. He opened the door, smiling at Naruto. “You ready for tomorrow?”  
That was right, tomorrow was the first day of summer band. Part of him was really excited, maybe things would really be different here. Maybe he could leave all the bullying behind. But part of him was also terrified of tomorrow. Despite that, he smiled and nodded. “Yeah.”  
Iurka smiled back. “Glad to hear that. I’ve got to go finish some stuff up at the school, new jobs involve a lot of paperwork. I’m also going to go run by the store to stock up on some food. I’ll be back in a bit, okay?”  
Naruto nodded. “Okay.”  
Laying down on the bed, deciding to forgo the last bit of the packing for now, Naruto felt himself really smiling. Maybe it really can be different here. Dad’s got a good job, and it’s a whole new school. His mind flashed back to the memories of his old school, and he winced. It’s going to be better here. It just has to be.


	2. Chapter 1: Summer Band

Chapter 1: Summer Band

The noise that filtered out from the band hall was almost deafening. When Iruka had said the band here would be bigger, part of Naruto hadn’t understood what he meant. And now, facing the band inside those doors, he was scared. He loved band, but the thought of what they might think about him terrified him.  
He took a shaky step forward, trying to slow his breathing. Don’t panic Naruto it’s fine this is different this is a new school you don’t have to worry about the bullies anymore. Nobody knows you here. Nobody hates you here. This is a chance to start over.   
Naruto swallowed, taking a shaky step backwards. Iruka’s words echoed in his mind “It’ll be great Naruto. I need to go a head of time to help Kakashi, he’s the band director, with getting set up, but I’ll be there. If you need anything just come find me, okay?”   
Memories flashed through his mind like a slap to the face. He grimaced, remembering. What if it happens all over again? I don’t want to go through this again.   
Naruto stepped to the side of the entrance to the band hall, leaning up against the wall. He clutched his hands together, trying to stop them from shaking.   
“Hey are you alright?” Naruto looked up, the sound of someone talking to him startling. The guy who had spoken looked to be in the same grade at him, though a bit taller. He was wearing a black t-shirt with the words “Fighting Shinobi Band” emblazoned on them. “You’re here for band right?”   
“Yeah…” Naruto choked out, still shaking.   
“Well then why don’t you come inside?” He extended a hand, smiling a little bit. “My name’s Sasuke by the way, I’m one of the drum majors this year.”   
“I…” He hesitated, still shaking a bit. “I’m just a little overwhelmed, sorry. This is all...a lot bigger than I’m used too.” And I’m terrified. Completely terrified of what people think of me.   
Sasuke nodded. “That’s understandable. Most everyone’s really nice, I promise it’ll be alright. Mr. Hatake is about to start though, you really should come inside and find a seat.”   
Naruto gulped, but stood up a little straighter. “Okay…”   
He waved for him to follow, walking into the band hall. Naruto reluctantly followed. “You good?” Sasuke asked, turning back to him slightly.   
Naruto managed a nodd, still shaking a bit. It wasn’t as bad as he thought it was though he realized, there were just more people. Perhaps it was a bit louder but it had some of the same energy as his old band hall. On the board were written the instructions to “Sit with your section, wait to get out instrument.”   
So, still a bit shaken, he walked over to the percussion section, sitting down in an empty chair. There’s nothing to be afraid of none of them could possibly know about your past or being gay calm down...That was what the logical part of him knew. But he still couldn’t shake the anxiety.   
Mr. Hatake stepped up to the podium, holding up his hand for silence. There was, of course, the ten to fifteen seconds you expect from a band before quieting. Naruto had met him before, he was a bit strange but seemed like a good director. The mask bit was a little strange, but he really did seem nice.   
“I hope you all are having a great summer and are ready to get to work with marching.” To Naruto’s surprise, this statement wasn’t just met with groans. Sure there were a few, but there were also more than a few cheers.   
Naruto felt himself smile a bit. Maybe it really will be different here. There’s a real feeling of family in this band, they really care.   
“But don’t think that this is going to be easy.” His words silenced the group. “We nearly qualified for state last year, this time we’re going to make it all the way. I will accept nothing less than your best every time you step on that field.” Mr. Hatake was quiet for a moment, letting his words sink in. “But I also believe in all of you. We have a real chance at this. This year we also have a new assistant band director, everyone say hello to Iruka Umino, Mr. Umino to all of you.” Naruto smiled as he mentioned dad. “But if you don’t think you can give it your all every time we’re on that field, it may be best if you were to leave now.” Again, he paused. No one moved. He smiled then. “Are you ready then Shinobi band!”   
As one person almost the upperclassman and returning members of the band stood up, holding up their hand with their two front finger up. It seemed odd to Naruto, but he recognized a tradition when we saw one. Soon him and all the other students were standing up, the Konoha Unison Sign raised in the air.   
The rest of that day at summer band was a blur. First they split into sectionals to work on the show music, then they came together to work on the music as a group. Then at Mr.Hatake’s instructions all instruments we put away and they headed out to the field to start learning the drill. Between everything there wasn’t much time to talk and transition between them Naruto felt a little lost, not sure who to walk with.   
But he didn’t let that keep him down.   
Before he knew it, the day was up for summer band camp. It was odd, it almost felt like they had just started a couple minutes ago. In reality though the group of now sweat, tired, teens, had been working for several hours.   
Mr. Hatake stepped back up to the podium. “Good job today everyone, I’ll see you all tomorrow. You are released.”   
The others all got up to leave, and Naruto followed even though he’d be leaving with Iruka in a minute. There was one person in particular he wanted to say goodbye to for the day.   
“Sasuke!” He said, waving. “Hope you have a good day!”   
But he didn’t even notice. He supposed it was possible Sasuke simply just didn’t hear him, but he couldn’t find himself believing that. Naruto saw him walking along with another group of people, and that’s when he realized. You were probably just nice to me because you’re a drum major, that’s what you’re supposed to do.   
It felt like a slap to the face. Maybe things weren’t different at all.   
Naruto shook his head, turning back to go back inside to the band hall. No...I’m not gonna let this ruin today. He managed a half hearted smile. Today wasn’t so bad. Could have been a lot worse...


	3. Chapter 2: Hamburgers

Chapter 2: Hamburgers  
Sasuke took a deep breath, holding his hands up, ready to start conducting. On Mr.Hatake’s remark Sasuke and Shikamaru shared a glanced out of the corner of their eyes and began counting off the show. And then they were off.   
He felt himself smile. It was just the first movement of the show so far, and it was by no means perfect. But the fact that they could already get through the first movement of the show, playing the music too, made him happy. They had the drill down for the next two movements too, now they just needed to pull everything together a bit more. Last year by this point they hadn’t had the rest of the music or the show nearly as good.   
It's funny...almost feels like summer band started yesterday...Sasuke thought as Mr. Hatake called everyone to the front to end the day off. And he smiled as he saw the new assistant director, Mr. Umino, standing next to him. I wasn’t so sure at first but he really makes a good director.   
Climbing down from the conducting platform, Sasuke made his way over to the group, in time to hear mr. Hatake start talking.   
“Good job everyone. For the first football game in a couple weeks we’ll probably do just that first movement, perhaps more if we pull part of the next movement together. But really, good job. We’re looking good, just keep working like we have been once school starts. I know you will all be busy soon, but during class and practice I need you to give it your all still if we’re going to do this.” Mr. Hatake smiled, “Now go eat your hamburgers, you guys deserve it.”   
Sasuke smiled. There was nothing to get a group of band kids excited like free food.   
People practically ran back over to the grills where Mr. Umino had been working to prepare the hamburgers with the parent volunteers. Sasuke smiled, talking and laughing with his friends along the way. That was the thing about band he always loved, sure he had his closer friends, but he considered every person in band a friend.   
They were family.   
And that was why Sasuke saw his role as drum major as more than just conducting the band and helping the directors. He really cared about the band, and everyone in it.   
Which was why seeing that new kid Naruto smile and laugh walking next to Sai, another percussionist, made Sasuke happy. It really seemed like the guy was starting to adjust. See Naruto? It’s not so bad here. I really do hope you find you have a home here. You’re one of us. And I think you know that.   
“Come on Sasuke, race me!” Sasuke turned back to his friends, seeing that Kiba was challenging him to a race. Again.   
For the millionth time Kiba….Sasuke sighed. “You’re in cross country and track, I don’t see how this is fair.”   
“True,” Gaara nodded towards Sasuke. “But you’re also the better sprinter at least. Perhaps better long distance. I’m telling you man, you should really do cross country and track this year. You can more than keep up with Lee and Kiba, and they’re both some of the best runners.”   
Sasuke shook his head. “No. I said no last year, and this year I’m also a drum major.” He smirked at Kiba and got set to run. “Doesn’t mean I won’t race you though.”   
Kiba smiled. “Of course.”   
Shikamaru rolled his eyes but started counting off. “3...2...go.”   
And they were off. By the time they got to the hamburger line, Sasuke was barely winded. “Ha! You have to admit, that was close.” Kiba grinned, standing in line.   
Sasuke scoffed. “Better than you were last year...but not by much.” He paused then, glancing over at the sight nearby. Mr. Hatake was smiling and laughing...and he was talking with Mr. Umino as he finished hamburger.   
Kiba looked over at the same scene. “You thinking what I’m thinking?”   
“What?!” Sasuke shook his head. “No. I was just thinking it was good to see Ka-Mr.Hatake happy.” Mr. Hatake. He’s Mr. Hatake at school. Just because you’ve known him forever and all doesn’t mean you can go by a first name basis at school.   
“It really is.” Shikamaru said, walking over. “But you’re lying if you weren’t thinking there could be something more there eventually, we’ve all been thinking that.”   
Sasuke continued shaking his head. “That isn’t our place you know. We shouldn’t be…”   
“I ship it.” Lee interrupted.   
He sighed at his friends, still smiling though. “Well...who knows. But it’s still not our place to say anything.”   
Taking their hamburgers they walked to the benches by the flagpole, people sitting and standing in various groups to eat. But there was a certain energy connecting them all.   
Sasuke saw Naruto then, standing there holding his hamburger, with a slightly lost expression. “Hey!” Sasuke shouted before he realized what he was doing, waving his arm to get Naruto’s expression. “You can sit with us!”   
Naruto’s face lit up with joy, and he came running over. “Thanks,” He said, still practically beaming as he sat down.”   
And Sasuke smiled to see him smiling. It almost caught him off guard, but something about this guy was that way. When he was happy, Sasuke couldn’t help being happy too.   
He was kind of a quiet guy Sasuke supposed, but Naruto was...really nice. He already felt like part of the group, at least in Sasuke’s mind. 

Sasuke smiled, waving to his friends as he turned to his bus stop.   
Wow...He thought, stepping on to the bus. I’m….happy. Really, happy. I...I belong. In band, I matter. That’s...that’s pretty special.   
He watched the rain picking up outside with a faint smile. It was good that it had waited until after practice for the storm to start.   
“Stop 34.” The bus driver called out, and Sasuke rushed to the door.  
Stepping out, he was still smiling. Even as the rain fell, he was still smiling.   
He rushed inside, taking out his apartment key as he walked up the stairs. And then he opened the door...and his smile fell slightly.   
Part of him really wished there was someone at home. But as always, it was just him. A familiar pang of remorse and guilt stabbed at his heart, but he was used to it by now.   
That’s alright...Sasuke’s hand brushed over the photo on the kitchen counter. I know...you’re still with me.   
The sound of small feet and a purring came then, and he smiled, crouching down. He scratched Aoda, his cat on his head, making him purr louder.   
“Yeah I know, you’re spoiled rotten.” Sasuke smiled, and picked the cat up. Aoda continued to purr happily, sticking his nose under Sasuke’s chin. “But I’ll still spoil you, everyday. Come on now Aoda, time to sleep.” The cat only responded by purring louder, nuzzling against his chin.


	4. Chapter 3: Try Not to Worry

Chapter 3: Try not to worry  
Naruto woke up determined it was going to be a good day. It was the first day of school, and he really needed it to be a good day. For his sake and Iruka’s, he was going to make that day work.   
“Good morning Sunshine,” Iruka smiled at him as he walked into the kitchen. “Ready for your first day of school?”   
He smiled at the nickname. Iruka didn’t use it often anymore, but it still made Naruto happy to hear it. “Yep. Today is going to be a good day, I can feel it.”   
Iruka practically beamed to see his son sounding so optimistic again. “Glad to hear that,” He said softly, putting a hand on Naruto’s shoulder, “And you know if you know if you need anything I’ll just be over in the band hall.”  
Naruto nodded, pulling his dad into a hug. “I know.” 

He had thought before that he was prepared to face the large amount of people in band, and had been wrong. That was nothing though, compared to the sea of people he faced now.   
Naruto was terrified, and not even sure how he had remained standing. It was chaos, people running everywhere around the campus, trying to get schedules worked out.   
Calm down...He tried to tell himself firmly, still feeling himself shaking. This...this is a chance to start over…  
“Hey, new kid, Naruto right?” A voice cut through the chaos surrounding him, as he suddenly realized someone was talking to him. He turned to see Kiba, recognizing him from band. “We grabbed your schedule for you, so you didn’t have to wait in line.”   
He faltered in surprise, touched that they thought to do that. And then he smiled, taking the folded paper in hands that almost didn’t shake. “Thanks.”   
“Anytime, but don’t thank me. It was Sasuke’s idea really.” Kiba said with a grin, and then he was off again.   
See Naruto? He smiled, clutching the paper tightly in his hands. Things are going to be different here.   
Another person walked past then, intentionally walking into Naruto. He whirled around, a devilish smirk on his face. “What the heck, newbie? I’m walking here.”   
Naruto felt his breath shortening, fear stabbing him in the chest like a blade. He could barely think past the fear, couldn’t move. His mind flashbacked to his old school, to the first encounter he had with the bullies there.   
One of his friends sighed. “Leave it Liam. You can pick on the little kids some other time.”   
“I’m not a little kid…” Naruto mumbled, not entirely sure how.   
Liam turned back, towering over Naruto several inches in height. “What was that trash?”   
“Leave it.” His friend called firmer.   
Liam hesitated, visibly thinking about it. Naruto felt a knot of dread forming in his stomach. “Whatever,” Liam finally said, showing Naruto back just a bit. “See you around newbie.”   
Naruto stood there for a minute, shaking. Calm down...calm down...It’s okay. Don’t...Don’t...try...try not to worry about it. This is a new school, a second chance. He glanced down at the schedule in his hands. Chemistry it is then. 

Before he knew it he had found the chemistry lab though, and the professor, Mr. Hagane was introducing himself. He looked hopefully for someone he knew from band when he entered the class, but there were only a couple he had barely met. One of them gave a bit of a wave, Kotone, if he remember her name correctly, but Naruto wasn’t sure it had been directed at him. The day continued on like that, a blur between class to class. He ran into Sasuke and his group once, they gave a wave and passed on.   
Luckily, Naruto found himself able to avoid Liam and his group. Until lunch.   
“Fancy meeting you again.” Naruto froze at the sound of the voice. The hall he was walking down to lunch was nearly empty, and from past experience he didn’t want to think about that. “Hey newbie, look at me when I’m talking to you!”  
He turned slowly, seeing Liam and his friend from before. There was also a girl with them now, another junior. “I…” Naruto backed up a little bit. “I’m just…”   
Footstep cam from behind him. That was Kotone from before, and her friend Keira. He recognized them from band. “Hey Naruto,” Kotone said, waving. “Come sit with the group at lunch.”   
There was an odd moment of hesitation between them. Seeing that Liam wasn’t going to do anything now though, Naruto decided it was best to get out while he still could.   
“Stay away from that jerk.” Keira advised as they walked. “He’s all talk. Don’t worry about it.”   
That’s what they said before...at my old school...they said not to worry about it...Naruto swallowed, trying to dispel the unease forming in his mind. “Thanks.” He finally managed to say, following them into the lunch room.   
Naruto took the offered seat greatly, and felt much better from it. He was grateful, that was for sure, to have a place to sit. But sitting there, keeping mostly to himself as the others talked a joked so easily, he couldn’t help but feel a bit out of place. A bit like baggage, like he was only there because they pitied him.   
He glanced over at Sasuke, and then shook his head, focusing on his food. Try not to worry about it Naruto. Things will be different here. He had an uncomfortable feeling that someone from the other side of the lunchroom was watching him, but didn’t dare look over at Liam’s table to check. They just have to be.


	5. Chapter 4: Smile

Chapter 4: Smile   
By the middle of the second week, Naruto felt himself drifting away from Sasuke’s group.   
But he was staying optimistic. Iruka seemed far less stressed here, so he focused on that.   
“So, how was your day Naruto?”   
Naruto smiled a bit. Things could have been so much worse. He was beginning to think Keira had said the truth, that Liam and them would do nothing more than taunts really. It wasn’t easy exactly...but taunts he could deal with. For once, he even had a place to sit at lunch. “It...it was good.”   
Iruka beamed, and pulled him into a quick hug. “I’m so happy to hear that Naruto.”   
He found himself smiling a bit more truthfully as they sat down at the dinner table to talk a bit. “So, how about you dad?” Naruto asked finally. “You seem to like working here at Konoha a lot more.”   
“It’s a good school,” Iruka nodded. “And the band is really good. Seriously, you and the others make a good group. I think we might have a real chance at state this year.”   
Naruto grinned. “That’s not all you like about band though, is it dad?”   
Iruka looked at him, shaking his head. “No Naruto.”   
“Uh-huh.” Naruto sat back a bit. “I’m sure it’s completely a professional relationship. Totally. 100%. Completely platonic.”  
“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean,” Iruka took a sip of water. “What about you then?”   
“No dad.” Now Naruto shook his head. “It’s only the second week of school!”   
Iruka smiled, laughing a little bit. “Well, I’m sure you have homework to finish already, so I’ll let you get onto that I need to take care of some of paperwork.”   
Naruto smiled a bit and got up to leave, heading back into his room with his school bag. Mr. Kamizuki had assigned a math worksheet for the night, Naruto didn’t like it but it needed to get done.   
His mind wanted to think about anything but geometry though. Events of the past week flashed through his mind, and it had all gone by so quick to begin this.   
Hey newbie! Naruto felt himself freeze as Liam’s voice shouted at the back of his mind. Trash, look at me when I’m talking to you!   
His hands gripped the paper tightly, shaking a bit. No! Not..not now. He shook his head, glancing back at the math worksheet. This is useless…  
“Naruto, I’m going to go run some errands, want to come?” Iruka’s voice sounded through the door, snapping Naruto back to reality.   
Belatedly, he realized he’d been staring at the same problem for five minutes. Naruto shook his head, rubbing his temple a bit. “No, I’m good dad.” He said finally. “I really need to finish this.”   
“Okay, I’ll be back in a bit then. If you still need help with it when I get back...I can try to help.” Iruka offered, stepping into the room. “Geometry, huh?”   
Naruto nodded. “I’m just having a hard time focusing.”   
Iruka frowned, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Something on your mind?”  
He hesitated. Again, everything flashed through his mind.   
The taunts and threats from Liam and his group echoed at the back of his mind. Maybe Keira was right, and they’ll never do more than talk. Talk I don’t mind. I can live with that. Just...talk is talk. He bit his lip, remembering. I thought it would just be talk at the old school though. How long will it be before they get tired of “just talk” here? How long...how long before it gets bad again? Naruto shook his head, forcing a smile. “No, I guess I’m probably just a bit tired.” That’s not a complete lie, I mean I am tired.   
“Alright,” Iruka pulled on his coat. He smiled. “Best of luck with the homework then. Take a break if you feel you need it.”   
Naruto forced another smile. “I will, thanks dad. See you in a bit.”  
He struggled through the worksheet, but found if he really focused on the math he could at least shove everything else to back of his mind. It doesn’t do to dwell on what might be. Naruto thought, closing the textbook finally. And I have to make this new school work...for dad’s sake. He really did smile then, thinking about how well Iruka seemed to get along with the head band director Kakashi.   
Naruto decided he was done with homework for the night and went to the living room, sitting down to watch TV for a bit. He flipped through a few channels, but found about as much luck focusing as he had with geometry.   
He just couldn’t shake this feeling that he didn’t belong here; he was unnecessary, unwanted, baggage. I don’t belong...anywhere do I? Just a useless...piece of trash. They...Naruto’s thoughts wandered to Sasuke and his group of friends. They only let me sit with them at lunch because they pity me, don’t they? I’m unnecessary...useless…I don’t even deserve their pity...  
Their laughs and taunts and threats were echoing in ear. Not Liam anymore, but the old bullies. They were throwing taunts like knives and someone was pushing him down. He felt the air get knocked out of him and he felt his nose break on the pavement. He couldn’t move, could barely think though the pain and fear.   
Naruto nearly screamed as he woke up. He was still lying on the couch. Just...just a dream Naruto. He felt himself relax slightly. That’s in the past. Calm down. It’s stupid to let yourself get worked up over that again. If they want to throw taunts and threats...that’s fine. Let them. It doesn’t matter anyways.   
“You okay?” It was Iruka coming in the door that had woken him up in the first place.   
“Yeah...yeah I’m alright.” Naruto forced a smile, shoving the nightmare to the back of his mind with everything else. “Just a dream.”   
Iruka smiled in return. “Good, I made ramen. Want some?”   
Naruto grinned.


	6. Chapter 5: Be Happy

Chapter 5: Be Happy  
Darkness. He was running, running through the darkness of that night. Screaming. He was screaming. Sirens. There were sirens in the distance. Blood. The memory of blood flashed through his mind. Pain. He felt himself fall, scraping his knees. Heartbeat. The world around him churned and he was sick, blood roared in his ears.   
Death. He was face to face with it and it scared him to his bones. That was what he was running from, death.   
“I’m sorry….one day you’ll understand…”   
Darkness. There was no escaping it.   
Sasuke woke up terrified and disorientated. It took him a moment to realize where he was, his apartment, Aoda curled up sleeping peacefully next to him. His alarm clock was blaring on the nightstand, flashing 6:00.   
He stared up at the ceiling, his mind tracing a disfiguration in the paint. He was still on edge after the dream, shaking with a bit of fear. Why now? After so long, why now? It’s been almost a year since the last time I had that dream. Why now?   
Still a bit shaken Sasuke dragged himself out of bed, smashing the clock to get it to be quiet. Aoda looked up hopefully at the prospect of food as Sasuke turned on the light. He smiled, reading down to pet the cat as he rubbed against Sasuke’s leg.   
Just a dream. That was a long time ago. Sasuke sighed, looking around at the empty apartment. And this is today. Focus on today. And yet he couldn’t help but look at the framed photo on the counter. Why Itachi? Why? Why did you do that?   
Sasuke shook his head, getting Aoda some food. That was a question he was willing to wait on. He had lived with not knowing the answer for more than eight years, getting the answer could wait.   
We have our first football halftime performance tonight and there’s a test in History today. I need to focus.   
Aoda was purring, wulfing down his food. Sasuke smiled, remembering when he had been given the cat. Kotone and Keira had gotten Aoda for Sasuke two years ago, saying he needed someone in the apartment to keep him company. That was right when he had moved in, and they had been right. He did need someone around, and Aoda definitely helped.   
So he focused. All throughout the day he tried to keep his mind on school, band, and his friends. His mind was drifting a bit though, back to the dream.   
And at lunch he couldn’t help but notice then Naruto seemed a little distant. He always seemed a little distant, but even more now. Sasuke wanted to say something, but he didn’t know what or how.   
Try not to worry about it. He told himself, but he was still worried. Just focus on band and school and just..be happy.   
But with his dream still weighing on his mind, he couldn’t help but feel a little uneasy. Itachi was still out there, that was a fact he couldn’t escape. 

Sasuke shook his head, carrying the last of the drums on to the band trailer. Focus Sasuke, you need to focus. What happened in the past happened in the past, don’t think about it.   
Stepping on to the band bus he saw Naruto sitting alone. He immediately waved, smiling to see if he wouldn’t mind sharing a seat. But he didn’t notice.   
And then Sasuke felt himself turning to sit with Shikamaru, with another smile that didn’t quite come naturally. He found himself laughing at their jokes but not really hearing them.   
Sasuke shook himself. This is band. You love band. Snap out of it.  
“Wait, has someone lowered Mr.Hatake’s chair yet?” Kiba pointed to the empty driver’s seat. That was the tradition, before every drive to and from every football game they always lowered the chair, annoying their director greatly.   
Why? Because tradition. No one was sure how it had started of course, back with the director before Mr. Hatake.   
“No,” Sasuke smiled, remembering first learning about the tradition back in sixth grade when he’d started helping out the high school band. “But I’ll take care of it quick.”   
And then they all grinned and Mr. Hatake sighed in exasperation, sitting down. There was a suppressed laugh from the people on the bus. Mr. Hatake glanced over at Sasuke giving him a “really?” look. Sasuke could only shrug, still smiling a bit.   
Mr. Hatake wouldn’t have admitted it, but he was smiling through his mask too. 

Naruto was looking out the windows of the band bus, watching the world outside. Liam’s words will still biting at the back of his mind, making it hard to think straight about anything. That, mixed with memories from his old school, was enough to back his stomach churn a bit.   
That was in the past. Focus on today. He smiled. First football game, first halftime show. It’s going to be great.   
He needed it to be great. He needed something to be looking forward too.   
He looked up suddenly, seeing Sasuke. He perked up, about to wave to to see if he would share a seat, but then Sasuke was turning to Shikamaru, laughing at something he had said.   
Naruto shook his head, turning back to the window. He wants to sit with a friend Naruto. Why would he want to sit with you anyways? Don’t feel to bad about it. He smiled, looking at the clear sky outside. It’s going to be a great night for a football game. Be happy.


	7. Chapter 6: Drifting

Chapter 6: Drifting   
Warning: Bullying and homosexual slurs in this chapter

Naruto froze, standing the entrance to the cafeteria. He found himself frozen, he couldn’t find in him to walk any closer.   
There wasn’t really anywhere open to sit at Sasuke’s table. Sure, if he’d asked, they could’ve made room.   
Because they pity me...Naruto shook his head, turning away. He didn’t really even feel hungry anymore. And I don’t even deserve their pity. 

The fact he had not sat down at Sasuke’s table did not go unnoticed by Liam though. 

Naruto didn’t really know where to do for the rest of lunch. His next period was Geometry though, so he figured he might as well head that direction. Turned out that the teacher left the classroom open and empty anyways, so he decided to just sit down.   
Outside it actually was a good day, barely a cloud in the sky. But even the warmth that streamed in with the sun through the windows seemed distant, far away.   
Is it really better here? He finally thought, shaking his head. Yes, it is. I can deal with taunts and threats, those are just talk. And it’s better for dad here. So I have to make living here...work.   
It’s not so bad, Naruto thought finally, pulling out some homework due the following day. Nothing I’m not used to anyways, not even really as bad. And at least I can still look forward to band. He smiled a bit, remembering that there would be another football game tomorrow.   
Of course...Naruto felt a growing pit of unease forming in his stomach. Liam’s on the football teams. But...no I’ll be surrounded by the whole band. As long as I stick close to other people...it’s be okay.   
He shook his head. Don’t worry about it Naruto. Just focus on the homework, whatever else happens will happen.   
The bell for lunch rang and Mr. Kamizuki came in, surprised to see Naruto. “Naruto? What are you doing in here?”   
Naruto forced a nervous smile. “I uh...don’t like the noise in the cafeteria.” He said finally. “Came in here to finish some homework for another class, hope you don’t mind.”   
Mr. Kamizuki smiled. “Oh no, you’re free to come in here and eat your lunch and work on homework anytime you want Naruto. I just thought you’d be wanting to sit with your friends.”   
Naruto felt himself freeze a little inside. If only I had the right to call them friends. I wish I did. “Oh, sometimes I do I guess. But I really don’t like the noise.”   
“Ah, well that’s understandable.” Mr. Kamizuki said as people began to come into the class. “Come sit in here anytime you like then. I’m usually eating with other teachers in the lounge or another classroom, but I don’t mind.”   
Naruto smiled, relieved the teacher had bought his story.   
Focusing on the lesson was hard, but he managed. He wanted to keep his grades up here, he knew that would make dad happy.   
The locker in front of Naruto slammed shut, snapping him back to the moment. It was in between classes, he had his history textbook in one hand now. And Finn was looming in front of him, a nasty smirk on his face.   
He felt himself stumbling back a step, his heart pounding. No...not now please...calm down Naruto there’s people around. He can’t do anything right now.   
“Liam wants to talk to you after school trash. Meet us outside the ag shop after your stupid band stuff.” Finn glared at him. “It wouldn’t be wise not to show up. And don’t you dare think about telling anyone.”  
Naruto gulped. He could only nodd. 

During band practice, he couldn’t focus. He kept dropping his drumsticks and falling of step, he almost dropped the quads once.   
Naruto glanced at his watch. Still half an hour left in practice Naruto. There’s no point in worrying about it till then, focus on this. We have a contest coming up, you gotta do your best.   
It was Sasuke who finally came up and said something to him right after practice. “Hey Naruto, you alright?”   
“Uh…” Naruto forced a smile, Finn’s words echoing in his ears. “Yeah I’m just a bit tired.”   
The lie almost caught in his throat. You don’t even deserve their pity Naruto. You’ve got to handle this on you own.  
“Okay…” Sasuke frowned. “You just seemed a bit distracted. Sorry if I intruded.”   
Naruto shook his head, and forced a smile. “No, really. I’m good.” He waved, walking away. “See you at the football game tomorrow--bye.”   
Sasuke waved in return. “...Bye.”   
Naruto stepped into the director’s office, waving to his dad. “Bye dad, see you at home I’m going to walk home, I like the walk.” He said quickly.   
“...Okay…” Iruka smiled. “I’m glad you like walking home.” 

Naruto stepped outside the band hall, taking a deep breath of air, and started walking towards the ag shop. It was only early october, but the air already had a bit of a bite to it.   
A laugh sounded through the air, sending dread through Naruto. He stopped, stone dead cold.   
“So you actually showed up trash.” Liam laughed. “Trash, turn around and look at me when I’m talking to you.” Naruto felt himself freeze. Liam grabbed his wrist, tight enough to leave a bruise he was sure.   
“What...what do you want?” Naruto stammered, shaking with fear.  
“I told you the other day that you’d be hearing from us.” That was Charlotte, Liam’s girlfriend.   
I thought that would just be an empty threat. I hoped.   
Liam grabbed him, pushing him up against a nearby wall. Naruto realized with a start there were no security cameras here either, it was a blind spot. He felt the air go out of his lungs with a grunt of pain and he was paralyzed with fear.   
He was surrounded and outnumbered. Liam had Finn, Isaac, Charlotte, and some of the other jocks. It was hopeless, there was no escaping it.   
So this is how it’s going to be then? Naruto felt himself die a little inside. Not like I’m not used to it though.   
“You’d best keep quiet,” Finn hissed. “You tell anyone about any of this this, and we’ll know. We’ll tell everyone about your parents. We’ll make sure everyone sees you for the worthless fag you are.”   
Naruto froze, dread sinking into him. They knew. Somehow, they had found out and they knew.   
“Even if they promise they can protect you, we’ll get to you. That beating would make this like nothing.” Naruto grimaces as Liam hit him in the stomach. “And who would want to protect someone like you? What I want is to take out some anger. You know you deserve this anyways.” 

Naruto almost had to limp home, but he put on a smile like a mask when Iruka came in the door later.   
This is just how it is then...


	8. Chapter 7: Happy?

Chapter 7: Happy?   
October 20th. That was the long anticipated day: their first band contest. This is when having a good show really mattered, it was advance or go home in defeated.   
Sasuke wasn’t exactly nervous as he put on his uniform though. They had a good show this year, he knew that. And this was just district competition, with Kakashi as their band director they always at least made it to region and had only once not made it to area. They’d fallen just short of qualifying for state nearly every year at area though, it just never worked.   
He sighed, pulling on the jacket of his uniform. It was October, but why do they have to hold these early competitions in the middle of the heat of the day? Uniforms were hot and uncomfortable to wear at times like this.   
Nevertheless, he was used to it. Sasuke glanced around at the band around him, smiling. Everyone was uncomfortable with the heat, but somehow because they were all uncomfortable it was slightly more bearable. This was band, and that was the bond that would get them through competition.   
He glanced over at Naruto, noticing he was standing a little of to the side. I should talk to him. Part of him wanted to go over and talk to him, but that same part had no idea what he would say. He’s probably just nervous about the competition...we all are.   
“You ready Sasuke?” Shikamaru’s voice snapped him back.   
“Yeah,” He said, shaking it off his mind. He glanced at his watch. “Kaka-Mr.Hatake will want us to gather the band up in a minute, we should get going.”   
Shikamaru nodded and they gathered the rest of the band, all around their director. Mr. Hatake gave his usual spiel, and then they raised the Konoha Unison Sign. With that tradition, Sasuke felt a bit of his anxiety fade. They could do this, this competition would be an easy win.   
Sasuke glanced back at Naruto though. He was raising the Unison Sign and smiling like everyone else...but something seemed wrong. Sasuke shook his head. It’s rude to stare. Focus. Competition.   
They marched to the field and onto the field as a group, Sasuke and Shikamaru at the head behind the directors. With the ease of practice, falling into these same familiar movements, his anxiety once again faded.   
They counted off, and Sasuke instantly knew it was going to be a good show. There were a couple miniscule mistakes, but nothing you would’ve noticed if you didn’t know the show.   
Sasuke found himself looking back at the percussion line, starting off as his autopilot brain took over conducting for a second. Staring at a certain quad player. Focus dammit Sasuke.   
He snapped back to the moment, bringing them to the final cut off. And he smiled, knowing he had been right, that was a good show. They hurried off the field, and glancing at Kakashi he saw that little smile, and then he knew even more certainly, that was a good show.   
Then Kakashi turned to Mr. Umino, that smile broadening. That made Sasuke happy, to see the man who had helped him so much after his parents death happy like that again.   
“Wait here for the food while I go get our scores.” Kakashi smiled, gathering the band. “That was a good show.”   
Sasuke smiled, watching him walk off in his perfect suit with his odd mask. Others might think he was weird, but he was a great band director.   
He turned around and smiled as the band gathered around for pizza. And this is a great band.   
He grabbed his pizza, turning back to laugh at a joke some friends made. It made him happy to see the people he cared about happy.   
And then he saw Naruto, sitting off to the side again a bit. He didn’t seem lonely exactly, but distant. Like his mind was elsewhere.   
Sasuke made up his mind, finishing the last of his pizza and walking over. “Hey Naruto,” He smiled, trying to look friendly. “Do you want to come join the group?”   
Naruto looked up, startled. “Um...I’m good actually.” He said, a bit nervous.   
Something in his eyes reminded Sasuke of elementary and middle school, where he had cut himself off from pretty much everyone else in his life. Convinced he didn’t need friends. Lost on a stupid thought of revenge. His mind elsewhere, while he was blind to the people who cared about him.   
Sasuke smiled, sitting down next to Naruto. “Something the matter?”   
There was an obvious moment of hesitation, and then Naruto smiled. Oddly enough, the smile seemed at least halfway genuine. “No, I’m just tired. Thank you for asking though.”   
Part of the truth at least, Sasuke thought, looking at Naruto. Didn’t look like he’d slept well the past few weeks. “Are you not sleeping well?”   
Naruto shook his head. “No, I mean...I just have a lot of studying to do. That’s all. I mean, kind of my fault by procrastinating, but still.” He smiled. “Just a bit tired though.”   
“Okay…” Sasuke frowned. “You sure?”   
Naruto nodded. “Yeah. When do you think Mr. Hatake will be back with the score by the way?”   
Sasuke smiled. “He’ll be back any minute, don’t be too worried about the scores though. We definitely got 1s, enough to advance for sure.”   
“Well you sure are confident.”   
“It was a good show.” Sasuke turned, seeing Kakashi walking over. He looked worried. Sasuke frowned, turning back to Naruto. “Come on, let join the others to find out out scores.”   
Kakashi stepped up on to a makeshift podium, a grim look on his face. He looked down at the folder in his hands, almost with a defeated look.   
Sasuke rolled his eyes, seeing through their directors farce. He did this last year too, why Sasuke was surprised anymore he didn’t know why.   
“Well, I’m sorry to tell you all,” Kakashi cleared his throat. “We got 1s across the board, best we could’ve done. Only a couple critical marks.” He smiled. “We did good, we’re advancing to region.”  
As one band, they cheered. And it seemed to Sasuke Naruto’s smile was just a little more full.


	9. Chapter 8: Didn't Realize You Cared So much

Chapter 8: Didn’t realized you cared so much  
The thud reverberated through Naruto’s skull as he fell to the ground. The dark sack they had put over his head blocked all the light, so he couldn’t see anything. The thud seemed to echo around him also.   
Naruto remembered the light, their nasty smirks all around him. The feeling of something hitting him, over and over again.   
But now it was all black and only numbness around him. And yet somehow there was still pain through the numbness.   
I remember my name. I’m Naruto. And I remember his name. He put me here, Liam did. Finn and the others helped. Right after band practice. I remember, I was excited. We added new things for the next competition. And then Liam was in front of me, he came up and said something. And then there were footsteps behind me. And all around. I was trapped. Something hit me in the back, and I let myself fall to the ground. Liam just watched, and then pulled me backup to hit me again. And I just let him. No cries. No tears. I deserved it anyways...and then there was a foot coming towards my face. And now I’m here.   
There was something bright, distant talking. Beeping, a hospital it seemed. Liam and his goons must have gotten me better than I thought. But no...I can’t let anyone know what happened. Fear bit at his mind. Can’t let that happen.   
The light was fading some, he could almost see a human figure through the dim. There was a voice, talking to him, calling to him. But it seemed so far away…  
“Naruto, sunshine. Can you hear me?” Dad, Iruka. Naruto tried to nod but it hurt too much. “It’s okay, you don’t need to move. I’m here.”   
There were voices outside, to far away to hear exactly what they were saying. One of the voice wanted to come in, the other wouldn’t allow it. The first was nearly crying, Naruto was sure of it. And then there was the sound of the door opening, footsteps.   
“Naruto, I’m sorry, I should’ve been there with you. I’m so sor-”  
Sasuke? You..you cared enough to come. I...you probably pity me. Pity. I’m pathetic, I don’t even deserve pity.   
“Sasuke,” Dad cut him off, “Naruto will be okay, but he needs rest, as it seems you do too”  
“I’m not leaving him.”  
“I never said you had to leave. Pull up a chair, you can stay as long as you want.” There was a screech as another chair was pulled over. There was a feeling of another hand around his.   
Sasuke and Dad are here with me, it’s nice. I can almost...pretend I feel safe now. I didn’t think Sasuke cared that much. He was the one crying, not me, not dad. Strange. Naruto tensed a bit as he considered something else. I wonder if they know about Liam and his goons. I hope no one puts two and two together.   
The door opened again. “We’ll need to ask Naruto some questions.” This was a new voice, Naruto didn’t recognize it.  
“Of course Officer Jiraiya, I just wish we could be of more help.”   
I don’t think dad knows then.  
“I might have an idea.”  
Sasuke, please don’t tell them, if you know. Please.  
“Really? What is it then?”  
“The part of town Iruka found Naruto in, it’s not a very good part of town. Muggings aren’t uncommon.”   
If only it were that simple…  
“That seems most likely.”  
“Yeah, well, I’ll make sure to look closely around there.” Jiraiya didn't sound very convinced.   
Please just buy that story.   
“Thank you, officer.” That was Iruka’s voice again.   
The door opened once more. “Jiraiya.” The voice of a woman this time.  
“Tsunade. Am I correct in assuming that you are his doctor?” It sounded like the Officer stood up to shake the woman’s hand.   
“Yes. Alongside his new bruises and lacerations I found older ones, dating up to a week ago.”  
Longer than that. They fade after a while, and Liam’s smart. He doesn’t want to get caught. We’re into November now. It’s been more than a month and half.   
“A week?!” Dad and Sasuke shouted simultaneously.  
Dad, Sasuke, calm down. It’s not that bad, I promise. I’ve had worse back at my old school…  
Both the doctor and the officer sat down. “Yes. Possibly longer.” Tsunade hesitated. “Is everything alright at school?”  
Naruto found himself opening his eyes just a bit, not to point any of them noticed.   
Iruka nodded, so did Sasuke.   
I guess they haven’t figured it out yet. Thank god for that.  
Tsunade made a note. “All you Jiraiya. Sorry if I went into your jurisdiction.”  
“No matter, anyways, Iruka,” Dad looked to the officer, “Is everything at home going smoothly?”  
Oh no, don’t think that. Iruka has nothing to do with this!  
“Yes. I adopted him when he was little, so it’s just the two of us, we moved here because of the bullying there.”  
Jiraiya jotted something down in his notepad. “Okay.” He turned to Sasuke. “You must be a friend from school. If there are any other friends that live in the same direction as Naruto, make sure they go with him. We don’t want this to happen again.”  
Sasuke nodded. “I will Officer.”   
Naruto let himself drift back to the darkness. You shouldn’t care so much Sasuke. I don’t deserve your pity anyways.


	10. Chapter 9: Falling

Chapter 9: Falling  
Warning: Bullying, Homosexual slurs, and self harm in this chapter. 

Naruto sighed, laying his head down on the desk. It was getting harder to sleep at night; Liam and the others seemed to always be at the back of his mind.   
It had been two weeks since they had put him in the hospital. That monday Iruka had agreed to let him come back to school, as long as he promised to walk a different route home after band practice.   
No one had put two and two together about the attack. No one suspected Liam and his group.   
Naruto winced, remembering that monday after band practice.   
“Hey trash. We heard you were in the hospital after last time, sorry about that. We’ll have to be more careful in the future. I assume you didn’t tell anyone did you though? Good.”   
He shook his head, getting the memory out of his head. He sat up, getting back the homework on his desk. After he had woke up and was able to move better he’d gotten some of the homework, but he still was playing catch up.   
Another memory from monday flashed through his mind.   
“Naruto?! You’re back! We were all worried, what happened last monday?” He had put on a smile like a mask, and lied through his teeth. “Ah, just an unfortunate incident. Some guy tried to mug me. Uh...thanks for checking on me Sasuke.”   
He slipped away from the group, ignoring their other questions. He’d avoided them more and more throughout the week, trying to avoid those questions.   
The pencil lead on his pencil snapped as Naruto clenched his fist. I can’t let Liam tell everyone what he knows. I...I don’t want them to hate me. I don’t deserve their pity though. He shook his head. Don’t think about it Naruto. Just how it is. There’s a football game tonight, be happy about that. 

Naruto set his quads down next to the band stands, smiling a bit. That was a good show.   
He smiled, stepping away from the rest of the band to go wash his hands at the restroom. He couldn’t feel...happy exactly but between those friday night lights and the feeling of a good halftime show..he felt alright at least. It was band, the only thing he really looked forward to nowadays. One of the only times he could really feel safe.   
And that’s when he realized his mistake. He should have never left the band alone. Now, with half of half time left on the clock, he was alone.   
Naruto turned, trying to head back to the band without panicking. And then he froze dead cold with fear.   
“Hey trash.” Liam’s voice.   
He felt the air get knocked out of him as his back slammed into a wall.   
“Monday after your stupid little band practice, don’t you forget it.”   
Naruto couldn’t even move. His brain was panicking, trying to rationalize the situation. No...no this is band. I’m supposed to be safe...supposed to be safe...gotta stick close to the group next time...and I ever safe then? Doesn’t matter...deserve this anyways…  
“Fag, give him an answer.” That was Isaac’s voice. Weird, he didn’t usually come to games.   
Liam shifted his weight, making it harder to breathe. Terrified he might really start choking him, Naruto nodded. He didn’t really even feel it as he was thrown to the ground and they walked away.  
Naruto lay there for a moment, trying to calm himself down. Staring up at the game lights in the distance, he felt himself crying. He didn’t want to cry, feeling he’d done enough of that in his life. But he couldn’t help it.   
I...I can’t take this anymore. There’s no rest...no rest from this pain. That thought that had been gnawing at the back of his mind, it was back. He didn’t want to go there, didn’t want it to get to that point. But he had no idea if he’s be able to stop himself.   
Naruto shook his head, dragging himself to his feet using the wall. He wiped the tears away and dusted off his uniform. Just get back to the band. Just get back there and surround yourself, lose yourself, in the music and try not to think about it. 

I… I can’t do it.   
The room lurched around him, blurry through the tears.   
1:47 am, still awake, still sitting in a corner hugging his knees.   
No…t I can’t take it anymore.   
He glances at the desk, where the dissembled pencil sharpener sat, moonlight glinting of it.   
No, that isn’t right. But why would they care? They only pity me, that’s why Sasuke visited me in the hospital anyways.   
He reached his arm to the desk, his hand shaking as he picked it up. He rolled up his sleeps, almost shaking with the tears. More tears rolled down his cheeks as he turned over his left arm. Positioning the blade to cut along the vein, Naruto heard footsteps coming closer, then passing by. Attempting to steady his hand, the blade pressed into his skin, slowly splitting it open. A dark red started to bead up on the surface, slowly growing.   
I… did. It’s done. Maybe this’ll end it, no, just a few more. Just a few more.   
The clock read 2:01, but Naruto payed no attention to the time. He was too focused on keeping the blade steady as he dragged it over his skin. More blood beaded up, and it started to run down his arm.   
2:39. Naruto looked at the clock, thinking.   
An hour and 32 minutes? I suppose time does fly when you’re having “fun”. This isn’t fun but, there is something about it. It’s fascinating, the sensation of skin splitting and watching blood bead up. Something about it calms me, I don’t want to stop, but if I don’t sleep, someone will surely notice that I’m not quite my normal self.  
Naruto stood up, wiping the tears from his eyes. Placing the blade back on the desk, covering it with his math homework.   
Peeking out to the hall, a pang of guilt hitting him the in stomach as he looked at Iruka’s door, he quickly went into the bathroom. I need to cover this with gauze so it won’t get infected.   
Naruto reached for the first aid kit and wrapped his arm after cleaning of the excess blood. Walking back to his bedroom, he realized that he’d need to wear either long sleeves or a jacket if he kept cutting after tonight.  
Heat is a small price to pay if cutting can calm me down and remove my mind from Liam and the others. I can deal with that.


	11. Chapter 10: Awkward

Chapter 10: Awkward   
Sasuke stared down at the math homework on the table in front of him, his mind other places.   
The nightmares were getting worse. Three in the last week.   
Why now? He shook his head. We’ve got region competition coming up. And I have school. I need to be focusing on this.   
But it was nagging at the back of his mind every moment. He wanted to know the truth, why did Itachi do what he did that night? There had to be a reason. A reason for the pain Sasuke had to live with now.   
He shook his head. That was an old question, and old pain. He knew how to shove that to the back of his mind.   
What’s more, he was was worried about Naruto. He ends up in the hospital, and then he won’t even really talk to me. He’s avoiding us, for whatever reason. Sasuke sighed. He’s probably found a different group of friends of something. It’s not your place to always be sticking your nose in other people’s business. But...I’m still worried.   
“You’ve got that look again.” Shikamaru’s voice snapped him back to reality, sitting in the common’s before school started. Staring at that same math problem. “What’s bothering you? Don’t give me a lie please.”   
Sasuke sighed, rubbing his temples. “It’s just the same old stuff Shikamaru.”   
“As in?”   
He glared at his friend. “Why do you care so much? Fine, the nightmares are back. And getting worse.”   
“You should talk to someone.”   
“No.” Sasuke closed his math book with another glare. “Besides, I’m talking to you. Right now.”   
Shikamaru leaned back in chair. “You know what I mean Sasuke. And there’s something else bothering you.”   
“It’s nothing,” Sasuke muttered, getting up.   
Shikamaru shook his head as Sasuke turned to leave. “If you say so.”   
Sasuke turned the hall, inwardly sighing a bit as he saw Sakura walk over to talk to him. He didn’t really know what to do about this anymore, and he didn’t particularly want to deal with it right then.   
“Hey Sasuke,” She said with a smile.   
Sasuke inwardly grimaced but outwardly smiled. Uchihas should always be polite Sasuke. “Good morning Sakura.”   
Sakura practically beamed. And then she blushed.   
I already don’t like where this is going…  
“Uh...Sasuke.” She finally said. “Would you...would you like to go out with me?”   
Sasuke felt himself internally die. It was obvious to everyone that she had liked him for a while, but it was something they just sort of...didn’t talk about. And it was something Sasuke had hoped he would never have to deal with outright. And now he had no idea what to say.   
“Ummm…” Sasuke felt himself blank. He couldn’t think of a reason to say no or a good way to politely say no. And so, quite unwillingly, he found himself saying: “Sure.”   
Sakura’s face lit up. “Really?! Thank you Sasuke, I promise you won’t regret it. Thursday evening, after band practice, Ichiraku’s ramen shop, that work for you?”   
Sasuke forced a smile. “Uh...sure. I’ll...I’ll see you after class then.” Sasuke awkwardly patted her on the shoulder (she was still grinning like she won the lottery) and walked towards his first class.   
What did I just agree to...god help me. 

Sasuke looked at himself disapprovingly in the mirror. He had opted to for the same clothing he usually wore at school, just jeans and a flannel. Didn’t really feel the need to dress nicely for this, it was just to the ramen shop.   
Still...is Sakura going to be offended? He shook his head, turning of the light. Why do I care? The only reason I even agreed to this was because I couldn’t think of a polite way to say no….I can already tell this is going o be awkward. Not a good awkward either. Uncomfortable awkward.   
He made sure Aoda had food and walked out, grabbing his coat.   
Sasuke met Sakura a block or two from the ramen shop.   
The attempted hug turned into an awkward handshake and Sasuke felt himself die a little more on the inside  
“Um...hi.” Sasuke said finally.   
Sakura frowned. “Something wrong Sasuke?”   
“Um...no.” Sasuke waved his hand. “We should uh...walk to the ramen shop.”   
So they walked to the ramen shop. In a very uncomfortable silence.   
“So…” Sakura attempted to break the silence. “How’s school?”   
“Good. You?”  
“...good.”   
More awkward silence.   
Finally they were sitting down and ordering ramen. Sasuke felt his stomach protesting the fact he hadn’t eaten since lunch, and quickly order a bowl. Sakura took a minute longer, but soon they were left in silence.   
“So…” Sasuke attempted to break the silence again. What should I say? I’m not good at talking to girls...I could talk to someone like Naruto in a heartbeat but someone like Sakura? I barely even know her… “This is...nice.”   
Sakura smiled. “Yeah, it is. Could we maybe do this again sometime?” Part of her sounded desperate.   
Sasuke didn’t know what to say. “Uh...sure.”   
Sakura beamed. “Great so...boyfriend then?”   
“...I guess so then.” Sasuke felt the awkwardness dragging at him in the air, almost choking at his words.   
“Great!”   
The awkward silence returned, only to be met with the server brining their ramen. They ate in silence.   
Finally Sasuke glanced at his watch. It was getting late, and he still had homework. Eager to get away, he seized the excuse, setting down money for the food. “Er...this has been fun an all--really.” He forced a smile. “But it’s getting late and I have some homework.” Sasuke stood up, turning to leave. “I’ll have to go for now umm...see you tomorrow.”   
Sakura frowned. “...aren’t you going to walk me home?”   
Sasuke froze, the awkwardness sinking into his stomach. “Oh...yeah.” He forced a laugh. “Sure. Um...how far away do you live? I need to catch a bus…”   
She shook her head with a sigh. “Nevermind. Thanks for taking me to ramen. Goodnight, see you at school tomorrow.” 

Sasuke sat at the lunch table the next day, notably uncomfortable. Sakura was sitting next to him, and the awkwardness between the group was palpable.   
“So…” Kiba trailed off. “You guys are dating now. That’s nice.”   
Sasuke nodded. “Uh...yeah.”  
Oh god this is awkward. Why did I ever agree to this? That’s when he saw Naruto passing by, just in the distant. He smiled a bit. Well Naru, I hope you’re at least having a better day than I am.


	12. Chapter 11: Region Band Contest

Chapter 11: Region Band Contest  
Naruto stared down at the geometry worksheet, working though it like a mindless machine. He didn’t want to think about anything, didn’t want to be doing the worksheet either. At this point, he’d be fine with whatever grade he got.   
No...He frowned, rubbing his temples. That’s a lie. I do care, for dad’s sake. For his sake, I have to make good grades here. Everything else going on is no excuse. He sighed, setting down the pencil.   
“Trash!” Naruto flinched.   
No no no Naruto that isn’t real. That was just a memory. Just a memory. He shook his head. A memory from just a few hours ago. Should have known on the one week we didn’t have football Liam would do something. Of course he did. Doesn’t matter though, I deserved it.   
He was breathing fast, clutching at the table now. Shaking. Snap out of it Naruto. That happened, now it’s over. You don’t have time to dwell on it. Stop freaking out.   
Naruto clenched his jaw, slowing his breathing. He closed his eyes, trying to focus on the present moment.   
And then his mind flashed back to another memory. Sakura and Sasuke, last week. They went out for ramen, and of course neither of them noticed Naruto as he was just leaving.   
That’s none of your business Naruto. He shook his head. Then why did I care so much about seeing them there? None of your business. So Sasuke’s going out with Sakura now? Why do you care? None of your business.   
He picked up the pencil again, wincing as his arm brushed against the table. Back to math. We’ve got to finish this before contest tomorrow.   
The memories refused to stop flashing through his mind though. Pain and fear, there seemed to be no escaping it. Weak...pathetic...helpless...a piece of trash...The pencil lead snapped, leaving an odd streak at the end of his equation.   
He sighed, sitting back in his chair. This is hopeless. I might just have to finish on the bus, no chance of focusing right now.   
The door opened and Iruka walked in, smiling. Naruto found himself forcing a smile in return.   
“Hey Naruto, still working on homework? It’s getting late, you should get some sleep before competition.”   
Naruto raised his eyebrows. “It is getting late. And you just got back. So I take it the date with Mr. Hatake went well?”   
Iruka sighed, smiling. “Yes Naruto, it went well. We went out to dinner and...yeah…”   
Naruto shook his head, still forcing the smile. “You can spare me the details dad. Everyone in band thinks it’s great by the way.”   
Iruka’s expression turned from delight to pure horror. “Wait what?! How do they know? Did you tell everyone or something?”   
Naruto looked over at him skeptically. “You haven’t exactly been subtle you know. People have been shipping you two since band camp.”   
“Shipping…?”   
He sighed, closing the math book. “Nevermind--I’m glad it went well.”   
Iruka frowned, sitting down next to him at the table. “And how have you been Naruto? I know it’s been really busy with band and everything these past few weeks preparing for region, how’s school and everything?”   
Naruto had braced himself for those questions. Always those same questions. How’s school and everything? Frankly, not that great. He looked at his dad again, his ponytail slightly messed up, a shadow of a smile still on his lips. But you love it here. Naruto thought of the band, and of the people he really wished he could call friends. And I love it here. in a way too. So I can’t tell you the truth.   
So he forced another smiled. “Everything’s great! I love the school and band and everything, glad we moved here.”  
Always the same question, always the same lie.   
Iruka pulled him into a hug. “You don’t know how happy I am to hear that Naruto. Now go get some sleep, big day tomorrow.” 

Naruto sighed, pulling on his band uniform pants. How is it this hot in November? I mean...it’s not that hot out. But wearing long sleeves sucks. He sighed, pulling on the jacket and wincing. Come on Naruto, focus.   
“Need me to zip you up?” Iruka said, walking over with a smile.   
Naruto forced a smile in return. “Yeah, thanks.”   
Iruka smiled, ruffling his hair a bit after zipping up the band uniform. “You ready? Big competition, everyone’s got to do their part. Everyone matters out there on that field.”   
Naruto nodded, picking up his shako and buckling it under his chin. “Yeah. I’m ready. We’ve got this.”   
He picked up his drums, marching in formation with the rest of the band. And he let his mind go blank with anything but band. Band was the only thing in that moment, the only thing.   
As usual, it was a good show. It was always a good show. And Naruto needed those good shows, he needed that to look forward to.   
The cut off came and with that, the band froze. Naruto loved that, that brief moment of complete stillness and silence from the band. He glanced over at their directors, and that familiar stab of guilt hit him hard as he saw his dad, smiling.   
But he shook it off, rushing of the field with the others. 

He bit his lip, not caring that it had started to bleed. For whatever reason, he was still a bit nervous as they sat in the stands, anxiously waiting the results of the competition. Perhaps it was the anxiety of the band around him that was rubbing off, Naruto found on his own he couldn’t really find himself caring that much.   
Wait what?! No. No Naruto. You love band. You can’t...you can’t let them take that away from you too. The reason you are anxious about the results is because you do care.   
“There they are!” Someone shouted, and all heads turned to look.   
The drum major were marching on to the field, taking their places. Soon, the results would be announced.   
An overly cheery man came over the intercom, blathering on about drabble a wee bit to long. But then the stadium grew quiet.   
“We will now announce the five band out of the twenty present here that will advance.”   
Fifth place--not them.   
Fourth place--not them.  
Third place--not them.   
Second place--not them.   
“It’s got to be us, it just has to be.” Someone whispered, half a hope half a prayer.   
“And in first place, the Konoha Fighting Shinobi band!”   
As one person the band released a breath they hadn’t quite realized they had been holding. Shikamaru and Sasuke turned on the field to face them, holding up the Konoha Unison Sign. And as one person, the band erupted into cheers, holding up the Unison Sign.   
And Naruto smiled a bit, looking down at Sasuke on the field. At least in this way, he was a part of something.


	13. Chapter 12: Fall and I'll Catch You

Chapter 12: Fall and I'll Catch You  
Sasuke sighed, closing the history book. Finally, He sighed with relief. If I have to hear that old geezer drone on about the roman empire anymore I will go insane. Now, lunch.  
He smiled, setting down his tray at the table. And he smiled at Sakura, a smile that was at least genuine.  
It had been a week since Sasuke had finally had the nerve to breakup, and he couldn’t be more happy with the decision. It was a holy barrel of awkwardness, but it was a relief to have finally said something.  
And now he was happy, because he had realized Sakura actually made a really good friend.  
He smiled, looking around the table. People were chatting and joking, like friends. All of you are really good friends. I’m eternally grateful for that.  
He glanced back at Sakura, and winced slightly. Well he was glad it had happen, the breakup had been awkward. There was still a little bit of that left.  
He sighed, rubbing his forehead. Just...let the awkwardness go Sasuke. You don’t have to be awkward anymore, she agreed it wasn’t working too. Friends.  
“A toast!” Lee declared, holding up his milk carton. “To the Fighting Shinobi Band and our drum majors!”  
Kiba grinned, holding up his milk carton. “May we advance at Area!”  
Sasuke found himself smiling, and held up his own milk carton with a small sigh. 

Sasuke cracked his muscle, stretching his arms out a bit. This is it. This is the point where it really counts, if we don’t advance and make it to state from here, then this was all for nothing. He pulled on his gloves, a little unnerved by the fact his hands were shaking.  
He sighed, looking up at the sky with slight passive aggressive anger. It’s almost december! Why is it so goddamn hot out here? He shook his head, almost laughing at himself. You can’t be mad at the weather Sasuke. At least it’s not as hot as Summer band camp.  
He smiled, looking around. He loved this, the slight chaos in everyone sprawled around the band trailers, trying to get uniforms on an instrument ready. Girls, and a couple guys, with long hair trying to tie them up inside their shakos. He laughed, seeing Shikamaru struggling with just that.  
I love band.  
That was when he saw Naruto. A familiar little twinge of happiness pricked at his heart as he saw the blonde, getting his uniform on like everyone else.  
Then, realizing he was wearing long sleeves, Sasuke frowned. What the bloody hell Naruto? Are you trying to get yourself heat stroke or something? If you faint on the field so help me...Sasuke stood up, taking a step towards him as he struggled to get on his band jacket without help.  
But before he had the chance Iruka was there, helping him. And Naruto was laughing at something his dad said. Sasuke breathed a sigh of relief, somehow that put him a bit at ease.  
Soon they were gathering around and Kakashi was giving his spiel--today was important, they all knew that. And this was in no way a certain win.  
It’s okay. Sasuke glanced around. All his friends, he believed in them. We can do this. He glanced over at Naruto then, seeing him picking up his quads. Please don’t pass out on us idiot. 

Sasuke froze, in that brief moment of quiet stillness that followed the cutoff. And he let go a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding, catching Kakashi’s eye. He nodded, seeing Sasuke look his way.  
That was good. Good enough Kakashi doesn’t look to worried. But now we just have to wait and see-was it good enough?  
He sighed, lining up with the band and marching off the field. No helping it now.  
Marching out from the field, he glanced over at Naruto again. At least you managed to stay on your feet during the show. He thought, as they dispersed out of formation to grab water.  
And that’s when he saw Naruto, doubled over, about to fall over. He rushed over, grabbing his arm to steady him as he almost fell. “Naruto?! You alright man?”  
He looked up with a weak grin, almost as if he was smiling to keep the grimace from showing. “Yeah...thanks. I think.” Naruto reached up, unbuckling his shako and taking it off. “Yeah, I’m alright now. You can let go of my arm Sasuke, thank you.”  
Sasuke frowned, letting go of his arm. “You sure you’re alright? Here, I can take your quads if you want.”  
Naruto waved him off, turning to go towards the water dispenser. “I’m fine, really.” And then he was gone, disappearing into the crowd of the band.  
What’s wrong Naruto? You can’t...You can’t keep avoiding me forever. He sighed, turning back to get some water himself. At least you had the common sense to not pass out during the show. 

Tensions were high as Shikamaru and Sasuke walked onto the field behind the other drum major. In the distance the sun was starting to cast low over incoming clouds, but Sasuke hardly noticed. The grass beneath his feet almost seemed to sway as the announcer came over the speakers.  
He took a deep breath. It’s okay. He glanced over at Shikamaru. We did good today. There’s no reason we shouldn’t make it. Only five out of twenty though. I guess that not to bad, if it was purely on chance we would have a ¼ shot. But it’s not purely by chance. And we did good today.  
“In 2nd place…” Sasuke was numb to the other bands cheering and celebrate as their names were called. “And in 1st place, The Konoha Fighting Shinobi Band! Congratulations to all competitors, and congratulations on making it to State.”  
We did it. Sasuke thought, turning back to their band and raising his hand in the Unison Sign. And as they cheered, he was sure a certain quad player was cheering with them. See Naruto? You belong here.


	14. Chapter 13: Tears

Chapter 13: Tears  
Non spoiler warning. Severe crying ahead. We cried writing this. Nothing else to say. Pain. 

Naruto sighed, walking home. He breathed in, trying to appreciate the the bite of winter coming to set in soon. He liked this moment. It was so silent out, just everyday noises at the city in the evening. Peaceful almost. He had passed the point on his walk where Liam would usually get to him, and he was beginning to think today he might get lucky.   
To bad it can’t be like this every night...He sighed. Well. I guess I just have to be grateful for small blessings. Looks like they’re leaving me alone for today. I hope. I really hope.   
He stopped for a moment, leaning against a lamp post. I...I don’t know..how much longer I can take this.   
Physically he was hurt, he’d stopped trying to keep track of the bruises. Tired to the bone, emotionally he world seemed to be crumbling into ash around him. And yet I’m smiling. Somehow around Iruka...and everyone else..I’m keeping up this...mask. He wrun one of his hand around the other, wincing as he brushed his wrist again. I wish I could tell you dad. I know you care at least. But I can’t do that to you. You love it here too much.   
“Hey you nasty faggot: piece of trash.” Naruto froze, his heart beating a thousand miles an hour in his chest.   
Not now...not now...please...Not Liam though. Just Isaac. Bloody hell, just Isaac?   
“What do you want?” He snapped, backing up. He was trembling, shaking. But this was just Isaac. Maybe, just maybe he could face him without falling apart.   
Isaac took a step forward, smirking as he saw Naruto flinch. “Liam and the others get to take out their anger all the time, why shouldn’t I get a chance? Listen hear you fag,” Isaac took another step forward and Naruto stepped back, tripping and falling to the ground.   
Damn you….He felt himself shaking uncontrollably, already falling apart. Panic tore at his heart and mind like a knife, cutting through any confidence he had managed to build up.   
Isaac laughed. Somehow, Isaac laughing like that was worse like this. He’d learned to deal with Liam’s laugh, it was always there. It haunted his dreams. But Isaac’s laugh always hung to the side, but now it was the only thing.   
He was hyperventilating already. Couldn’t barely move or think through the panic.   
Naruto felt the kick to his stomach, but he didn’t feel it. It landed on top of so many old bruises it didn’t matter anymore. He curled up, trying to hold himself close. At this point, he was too tired to care what Isaac did.   
“Listen here,” Isaac finally said, holding him up by the collar of his shirt. “You’re pathetic. Liam wanted me to deliver a message, that’s why I’m here anyways. See you tomorrow trash, see you at lunch.”   
Naruto lay there for a minute as Isaac walked away, his breathes torn and ragged. I need...I need to get home. He finally pushed himself to his feet, collecting his books that had fallen from his bag. Dad can’t be asking questions. 

The next morning, he found the note in his locker. North Wing of the school, at lunch. Be there, or you might as well kill yourself trash.   
His hands shook, shoving the note into a pocket of his jacket with a sigh. Careful what you wish for Liam. Wouldn’t want to lose your punching bag, would you?   
Unsurprisingly, he couldn’t focus on Chemistry. And unsurprisingly he missed Sasuke glancing over at him worriedly during the passing period, he never saw Sasuke looking his way.   
Naruto felt himself start to panic in second period. Finally he asked if he could go to the restroom.   
And he fell apart, curled up against the wall, shaking with tears he didn’t know how to stop. He felt himself getting sick, and hardly made it to the toilet before he threw up. Memory after memory raced through his mind, there were too many memories of this happening. Too many punches and kicks and hateful words.   
“I can’t...do this anymore.” He stared up at the ceiling, miserable. “But...I need to get back to class.”   
Naruto barely registered it as he walked back through the hallways that he walked past Sasuke. 

And then came lunch.   
Naruto gulped, flinching as the bell rang.   
He glanced toward the cafeteria, walking towards the North Wing. There’s no point. Wouldn’t have time to eat and wouldn’t be able to keep the food down anyways.   
He froze before the door, not even knowing what to do at this point. Am I really just going to let this happen, again and again? Do I really care so little? And then he pushed the door open. No, I don’t care at all. I’m a worthless piece of trash, why would anyone care?   
“Hey trash,” Liam walked up behind him and he flinched, as Liam threw his arm around his shoulder, pulling him towards the bathrooms. “Glad you came.”   
“Liam,” Naruto felt himself freezing up. He was fighting to keep his voice steady. “What do you want?”   
“Same thing I always want trash,” Liam pulled him into the bathroom, grabbing his head by his hair.   
Naruto barely felt it as he was shoved against the wall, a stab of pain in his side as the air was knocked out of him.   
Finn was standing there with a disgusted smirk on his face. “Hey fag,” The second shove into the wall hurt more than the first. “Long time no see.”   
There was no helping it, he couldn’t hold himself together. Fear gripped at his heart and mind like a thing with claws and teeth.   
No...no….please...I can’t take this anymore. Naruto curled up, his arms around his head, wishing for all the world he could be somewhere, anywhere else.   
He felt himself getting dragged to his feet, someone holding him by his hair. Anymore and it almost felt like they might rip out his scalp.   
“Please…” It was barely a whimper. He couldn’t stop himself anymore. Tears were coming and he just couldn’t stop them.   
Finn laughed. Liam laughed. “You’re pathetic.”   
He felt himself getting dragged over, and he couldn’t hope to do anything about it.   
Liam shoved his head into the toilet, and sudden inability to breath hit him. Just...just hold your breath…  
But already his body was fighting against not breathing in. He still hadn’t recovered properly from earlier, and daggers of pain were tearing through his lungs.   
He was fighting at the edge of consciousness, black darkness seemed to be closing in on all sides.   
Why? Why? I...I don’t want to fight anymore. I just want this to be over with.   
And then the immense pressure to hold his breath was gone. He gasped for breath, shaking.   
Then the darkness was back and he was struggling to hold his breath and he new any moment he wouldn’t be able to stop it, he’d breathe in. The darkness was closing in ever closer, pain shooting into his lungs, and he was beginning to think just giving up wouldn’t be so bad.   
And then the pressure, the water, was gone. And then it was back. And then it was gone.   
You bastard. Just let me fall unconscious already... He gasped, unable to hold his breath any longer. Water burned at his lungs. Better yet...just...kill me now.   
He gasped again, feeling him being thrown down to ground. He couldn’t move, couldn’t think about anything put trying to get air in again.   
Liam threw one last kick at his stomach and he could barely groan in pain. “See you around trash.”   
Naruto lay there, crying, trying to keep conscious. Just breathe. Some small part of him said, fighting back against that darkness. You can’t just give up yet. Just breathe. Just breathe.   
He didn’t go to the class after lunch. Nor the class after that.   
No one comes to this bath room anyways, He had managed to get to the corner, curled up in a ball. And who would care anyways. But last period was band. Last period was important. I’m not letting you bastards take that from me too. He pulled himself to his feet and dried himself off as best as he could.   
He was still shaking though, and almost feel to his knees. I’m pathetic. Absolutely...pathetic.


	15. Chapter 14: Revelations

Chapter 14: Revelations

 

“...many Jacobites were taken prisoner and tried for treason then sentenced to death. Remember to-.” The bell rung, cutting of Mr. Sarutobi’s last assignment. “Lucky, you were saved by the bell.” He chuckled, walking out of the class with some students.  
“Hey Naruto. Wanna come eat with us?” Naruto winced at the question. They’d asked a couple times before, he’d always said no.   
Naruto turned, forcing a smile. “Hmm? Oh, sorry Kiba, I have some stuff to take care of, maybe tomorrow.” Not likely, but I need to act normal.   
Kiba looked a bit crestfallen.“Oh, okay. See ya in band later.”  
“Yeah, see you.” He dropped it faster than normal, good. I don’t want their pity, I don’t deserve it.  
Naruto walked through the halls, in the opposite direction of the cafeteria. It was like trying to go upstream in a fast coursing river, but he managed.   
The geometry classroom, that’s where I always go. Mr. Kamizuki said he leaves his door unlocked for students who need a break from socializing. And he said he was fine with me going there.   
Mr. Hagane and Mr. Kamizuki waved to Naruto as they passed in the halls.“See you after lunch Naruto.”  
“I’ll be in your classroom, just a bit of work for Mr. Sarutobi.” He said, turning to Mr.Kamizuki.   
“Alright.” The teacher nodded and turned back to Mr. Hagane.  
“Hey, Izumo. I was thinking maybe we could take some of the classes out one of these days. Give them a break and all.”  
“We’d need to talk to principal Sarutobi about it. You know that Kotetsu.”  
Their voices faded down the hall as Naruto entered the classroom. Somehow in the beginning of december the school could afford to keep classrooms at the temperature of a furnace. It’s dark, no one’s here, I’ll be able to take of the jacket then.  
Naruto took off his jacket slowly, as to not let it catch the scabs of newer cuts. He winced as it brushed past bruises.   
There was a quiet gasp, then the clattering of a pencil being dropped.  
“Naruto! What happened? Is everything-” Naruto spun around to see a freshmen from band staring at him, Tom if he remember correctly.   
I don’t feel like answering questions right now. And you are one of the last people I would want to be seeing this. “Don’t tell anyone what you’ve seen, you hear me Tom?” Naruto glared, trying not to panic.  
“But-”  
Naruto interrupted. “No ‘but’s. Okay? Promise me you won’t tell anyone, not Sasuke or Da-Iru-Mr. Umino. No one can know okay?”  
“I, I promise Naruto. I won’t tell.”   
You better not. I’ll be in big trouble if anyone else finds out… It won’t end well.  
They sat in an awkward silence as Tom finished his classwork and lunch while Naruto just stared out the window to the courtyard.  
The bell rung again, leaving Tom to scurry around gathering his stuff before leaving. Just as he stepped out the door, other students entered the main halls.   
“Tom, I mean no one can know about this.” Naruto’s voice cracked a bit. “No notes or texts can be exchanged about this, okay?” Please...  
“I...I understand Naruto.. Not a soul.” Tom hesitated. “Please tell me...or someone... if it gets worse though. Sometimes just talking helps.”  
You have no idea...“Thanks. Now get to class before you’re stuck in here with sophomores.”

 

Naruto wrapped the jacket tighter around himself, clutching his books to his chest as he trudged through the snow. It’s only late November. But with this snow that came in last night, it’s bloody cold out here. His mind flashed back to earlier that day. But somehow the school can afford to keep classrooms at the heat of a furnace. Just my luck.   
He sighed, shaking his head. He didn’t want to think at how he’d seen Tom keep glancing over at him during practice earlier. And it was probably just his paranoia, but it almost seemed like a few other people kept glancing over at him. He didn’t want to think about what might happen if Tom had told someone. Keep your mouth shut for one Tom. This isn’t a joke.   
“Hey trash, stop walking and look at me when I talk to you.” Naruto froze. Liam’s voice. That same voice that was starting to haunt his dreams.   
He turned, seeing Liam, Charlotte, Finn and Isaac. Well at least they don’t have the others. “What do you want Liam.”  
Finn stepped forward with a smirk, his boot crunching into the snow. “You know what we want fag.”   
Naruto didn’t know what possessed him at that point. I’m done with this. I don’t know how much longer I can just keep doing this. I’m tired. Exhausted. "Ha, you think this scares me anymore? I've gotten used to it, so you might as well go get yourself a punching bag. Use your brains for once. If you’re gonna kill me, do it now. I think you’ve had enough fun with me as your toy, get it over with or just move on."   
They stared, unsure how to react to his outburst.   
And then Liam just laughed. And Naruto felt himself start shaking again, fear driving through every bit of his bones.   
“You think you get to get out that easy fag?” That was Finn. Now they were all laughing. “You don’t deserve to die.”   
He felt himself fall to his knees. He felt the punch. But it was distant.   
He felt snow getting thrown his face. He felt the cold bite to the bone. But it was so distant.   
Through the haze of pain around him everything was distant.   
And then there was a voice cutting though to din.   
“Hey! What the bloody hell do you think you’re doing?!”   
He looked up. That was Keira’s voice. She was with Kotone, Gaara, and Lee. Surprisingly, they all seemed to be following Keira’s lead on this. They were probably walking home from band practice.   
Oh gods. Did Tom tell all of you? What now?   
“You should mind your own business dyke.” That was Charlotte, and she was turning to Keira. For the moment, Naruto realized he could breathe. Liam and his friend were too focused on Keira and he group.   
Keira, with Charlotte towering a full head above her, held her ground. “I decide what my business is. And someone messing with a friend of mine is very much my business. So, what do you have to say for yourselves?”   
“What are you, a bunch of band nerds, going to do about it?” Finn stood up next to Charlotte, standing tall.   
I don’t know like where this is going...Naruto thought, inching backwards.   
“You alright Naruto?” That was Gaara’s voice, sending him a worried glance. Naruto swallowed, and found himself shaking his head silently.   
Liam shot him a glare. “You can stay right where you’re at trash. We’re not done here.” He stepped up by Finn and Charlotte. “This is none of your concern. And there’s nothing you can do about it.”   
“You are done here. You happen to be talking to four people who have trained together in karate since they were little kids.” Kotone said, ice cold serious. “The next move is yours. Chose carefully.”   
“Was that a threat?” Charlotte glanced at Kotone.   
Keira stood up even straighter. “No,” She said, getting in front of the group. “I will boil your teeth and make your bones into pottery if you ever even think about hurting Naruto again--that was a threat. See the difference?”   
Charlotte glared, Keira met her gaze. Charlotte threw the first punch.   
Keira pulled her into a throw and brought her down to the ground, following up with a punch. Kotone and the others acted similarly as Liam and Finn moved in.   
Naruto ran.   
He heard Lee calling after him.   
But he ran. He ran until he couldn’t hear anything behind him. He ran all the way home.


	16. Chapter 15: Promise

Chapter 15: Promise  
(Back to band practice that day)  
It was right before band practice, out at the field, everyone milling about in loosely connected groups. Something in the air was worrying Sasuke. For better or for worse, he was sure something was about to happen.   
He turned to laugh at something Lee said, snapping back to the moment. And then he smiled, looking around at everyone. “It really has been a good year, hasn’t it?”   
Shikamaru and Lee both nodded. “But don’t go soft on us just get Sasuke,” Shikamaru shook his head. “We’ve still got State in three weeks.”   
“We cannot depend on just the spring of youth to win us the competition!” Lee declared. “We must work hard.”  
Sasuke nodded with a small chuckle. “I know.”   
And then it was that a freshmen kid came running over to them, having just arrived at practice apparently. He must of ran all the way, he looked a bit out of breath. He hadn’t even grabbed his instrument yet.   
Tom...yeah, Tom was his name I think.   
“Sasuke…” He gasped for breath. “I’ve been looking all over for you.”   
Sasuke frowned. “What’s wrong? It’s okay, whatever it is Lee and Shikamaru can hear it too.”   
Tom stood up straighter, and the look in his eyes scared Sasuke a bit. He’d never seen the freshmen so worried. “It’s...Naruto.”   
Worry and dread almost shot him through the heart at that point. “What about Naruto?” His tone had grown very serious.   
“He…” Tom shook his head. “I was in one of the math classrooms, and Naruto came in to sit down and have lunch. Well...he didn’t really end up eating any of his food. It was hot...really hot in the classroom, I think the heater was malfunctioning. And then Naruto took of his jacket and…” Tom bit his lip. “It was horrible Sasuke. I don’t know...there were so many cuts...and so many bruises…I don’t how someone could do that...”   
Sasuke felt his breath almost catch in his throat. Tom’s words had hit him like they had a physical force of dread. Oh Naruto...why...why didn’t you tell us? How long have you had to face this...all alone? At least since that day you were in the hospital, longer even than that though. Who is it that has been hurting you? I swear, I may just kill them. “What? When was this?” He said out loud, trying to keep his voice from shaking.   
“Today at lunch.” Tom said weakly. “He...he begged me not to tell anyone. But I couldn’t just...not saying anything.”   
Shikamaru shook his head, putting a hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay, thank you for telling us. But it’s probably best you don’t tell anyone else.”   
“Uhm…” Tom looked nervously at the ground. “I might have...told a couple other people? One of my friends asked what was bothering me earlier. I mean...they’re in band. I trust them.”   
Sasuke frowned, rubbing his temples. “So by now probably everyone in band knows.” Sasuke frowned, picking his phone out of his pocket. There was only one solution at that point.   
“The message needs to come from you Sasuke.” Shikamaru said, seeing his hesitation to start typing. “You may be just a sophomore, but people in band will listen to you. Tell them not to talk to him about this, you need to talk to him alone tomorrow. And tomorrow we will tell Kakashi and Iruka about the bullying.”  
“But just the bullying.” Sasuke said quietly.   
The band chat. It had been Sasuke’s idea originally, Shikamaru had helped. It was off the radar of the school, not even the directors new about it. But it had everyone in band in it.   
Except for Naruto. Because Naruto still had a flip phone.   
He took a shaky breath, and started typing. I’m sure by now, most of you have heard this. But please, no one confront Naruto about this. Just, try to keep an eye on him without being suspicious if you can. I will make sure a few people get him home safe tonight. No one talk to him or talk to anyone else about this, I will talk to him tomorrow.   
He turned off his phone, at that point not wanting to see the replies. He just had to trust people would listen. Sasuke did trust people would listen, this was band. They were a family almost, and a family sticks together.   
And it seemed people were listening. Almost everyone was pulling out they’re phones, and quiet murmurs of agreement were passing between them.   
Sasuke’s breath caught in his throat, tears almost threatened as he thought about how long Naruto must have had to face this alone. Never again Naruto. After today, I’ll never leave you alone to face the darkness again. I promise.   
And that was when Mr. Umino’s car pulled up. Sasuke saw Naruto get out, and felt his heart breaking for his friend.  
He hurried over to where Keira and Kotone we talking with Gaara. Lee followed, walking over to stand next to Gaara. “Guys, I have a favor to ask.” He said finally. “Can you make sure Naruto gets home safe? I trust the four of you to do that…” He felt his voice cracking. “Please…”  
Kotone put a hand on his shoulder. “Of course Sasuke. Don’t worry. We’ll make sure our Naruto is safe, I promise.”   
Sasuke looked back over at Naruto, seeing him go and pick up his quads. Today most people were wearing jackets anyways. But now knowing the reason why he had worn long sleeves even when it was hot out hurt his heart to think about.   
I’m so sorry Naruto. He wanted, right then and there, to go talk to him. But he didn’t want to scare him, with so many people around. I promise, I’ll make sure things get better. It’s...it’s going to be okay now.


	17. Chapter 16: I Could Never Hate You

Chapter 16: I could never hate you  
Sasuke hesitated before opening the door, not even sure exactly what he was going to say. He struck the wall slightly in frustration. There’s nothing I can say to make this okay. He realized, taking a deep breath. But Keira’s voice as she had angrily told him what had happened yesterday but into his heart. But I have to try. Naruto...Naruto needs us right now.   
He opened the door, stepping inside and closing it behind him.   
Naruto was sitting at the back of the room, laying on a desk with his head in his arms. A tray of the cafeteria food sat untouched on the desk next to him. Seeing him there, the sunlight streaming in through the window and falling on his golden hair, Sasuke wanted nothing so much in the world as to hold him close.   
But he knew he couldn’t do that yet.   
“Hey Naruto,” He said finally, sitting down at the desk beside him. “I know...I know you probably don’t want to talk to me.”   
Naruto didn’t look up. “Why are you here? I don’t want your pity, I don’t even...deserve it...”  
“I don’t pity you.” Sasuke said, not sure what else to say. “But I do care about you. All of us in the band care about you, you do know that right?”   
He shook his head softly, turning away. “You’re just saying that. Did Tom talk to you guys? Is that what this is?” Sasuke realized then that Naruto was crying, softly. “You should go Sasuke.”   
Sasuke felt his heart break a little. Oh Naruto. What happened to make you like this? People have broken your trust so many times you can’t find any more trust to give. I understand that...but I can’t just leave.  
“I’m not going anywhere Naruto.” He sighed, rubbing his temples. “You need to talk to someone. If not me someone else but….please.” Sasuke felt his voice breaking. “We’re here for you Naruto. All of us.”   
Naruto was shaking his head again, trembling. “Who else did you tell you bastard?”   
Sasuke winced slightly. Naruto was angry, he could tell. And he had every right to be. “I tried to stop Tom Naruto, I’m sorry. A fair amount of people in band know, but to the best of my knowledge no one outside band does.”   
He just kept shaking his head. “Not your fault.” Naruto said finally, barely more than a whisper. “I guess it was inevitable. It’s my own damn fault anyways.”   
“No!” Sasuke felt himself speaking before he had a chance to even thinking. “Nothing about this is your fault. Naruto…”   
“All of this is my fault.” Naruto sat up, looking him in the eye. Sasuke was always a bit struck with how blue Naruto’s eyes were, like the sky outside. “All of it. I’m pathetic and weak and...I deserved this.”   
Sasuke extended a hand, wanting to touch Naruto on the shoulder, let him know he was there for him, somehow. But when he flinched away he figured it was better he didn’t. “No Naruto. That’s not true. Everything with Liam and what his bastards have done to you, you didn’t deserve that.”   
Naruto tensed at his words, looking over. “How do you know about that?” He demanded.   
“Shikamaru put two and two together. And...Keira and the others told us what happened yesterday” Sasuke said softly. “We’re never going to let them hurt you again Naruto, please...trust me. We care about you.”   
Naruto was shaking with the tears now. “No!” He stood up, backing against the wall. “You don’t understand…” He trailed off. “You don’t...understand…”   
Sasuke stood up, wanting to scream with frustration as Naruto winced at his approach. “Then help me understand. Please Naruto. We’re never going to let them hurt you again. And please...stop hurting yourself.”  
“You don’t understand! You can’t stop them…” Naruto pounded his fist against the wall. “You can’t stop them. And then...and if you try to...they’ll think I told someone. And then they’ll tell everyone.”   
Sasuke felt sick to his stomach. “Naruto.” He said finally. “Please look at me.” Naruto looked up, reluctantly. “We will never let them hurt you again. Whatever secret they’re holding on to you with…”   
“But you’ll all hate me!” Naruto sank down against the wall, curling up into a ball on the ground. “And...I don’t want you all to hate me.” He sniffled. “Although I’m sure you already do. I hate me.”   
Sasuke took a step forward, kneeling down in front of Naruto. “Naruto please look at me. I could never hate you. We could never hate you.” He put a hand on his shoulder, grateful he didn’t flinch. “You’re one of us Naruto, one of the band. And you’re our friend, okay? We aren’t going to stand by and let someone hurt you.”   
Naruto looked up, tears still falling. “But...I’m cursed Sasuke. My parents...were murdered when I was three...you don’t think that spells ill for anyone around me?” He shook his head, shaking. “I’m a curse.”   
Sasuke nearly pulled him into his arms at that point. “Naruto...listen to me. We would never hate you for that.” He hesitated, taking a deep breath in. “I went through something not too different you know.”   
Naruto looked up, blinking in surprise. “What?”   
He swallowed, fighting back years of grief. “My parents were killed when I was five. You’re no more cursed than I am. That says nothing about you as a person. You’re not cursed.”   
Naruto was shaking. “But that’s not all...they’ll tell everyone else the other thing too.”   
“It doesn’t matter Naruto, whatever your secrets are they don’t matter to us. We won’t think any less of you because of them. You’ll always be one of us, and we’ll always care about you.”   
“You won’t say that when I tell you.”   
“Try me.” Sasuke replied without thinking.   
“I’m…” Naruto took a deep breath. “I don’t know why I’m telling you this. But...I’m...gay.” He nearly choked on his words, shaking again with more tears.   
Sasuke pulled him into his arms, surprising Naruto. “Listen to me Naruto.” Sasuke held him close, glad that Naruto didn’t try to pull away. “We could never hate you for that. Gaara and Lee are dating, Keira and Kotone are dating, Kiba and Kankuro are dating, and we don’t hate them for it. And I’m bi. Heck, unless we tell you otherwise it’s safer to assume everyone is at least somewhat bi. No one in our group...no one would hate you for that. Never would we hate you for that.” Sasuke could feel himself crying, but he didn’t care. “Don’t you ever think otherwise. Whoever hurt you, I won’t let them ever touch you again. I promise Naruto. I promise.”   
Naruto was shaking again. “But…” He looked away. “I deserved it all anyways. I’m a piece of garbage, I’m not even worth your pity Sasuke.” He sniffled again. “It’s not...it’s not so bad really. It’s okay...I’m used to it.”  
Sasuke pulled him back closer to him, shaking his head. “No Naruto. Stop...stop normalizing this to yourself. This isn’t okay. You don’t deserve this. Please, listen to me Naruto. We all care about you, I care about you. And we’re never going to let them hurt you ever again, I promise.”  
“You...you really...mean that Sasuke?” Naruto sounded half hopeful at least.   
“I mean that with all my heart Naruto. Shh...Just don’t worry. Please. I’m here for you, just focus on that.” They sat in silence for a minute. “I’m sorry Naruto.” Sasuke said finally, barely more than a whisper. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, I should’ve been. I should’ve seen what was happening. I’m a horrible friend for not. Please just...try to find in yourself to trust us. I know you probably can’t believe in yourself much right now, so let us believe in you for you.”   
Naruto pulled him closer, relaxing just a bit. “Thank you Sasuke.” He was crying. “I...I don’t know how much longer I could of…”   
“Shh.” Sasuke held him close. “Things are going to get better now. I promise.”


	18. Chapter 17: It's going to be okay

Chapter 17: It’s going to be okay  
Naruto sat there with Sasuke for some time, still crying softly.   
Finally, he was starting to hope again. A great weight had been lifted from him, one he hadn’t quite realized how much it hurt to carry. And now...now he could finally...breathe.   
“Shhh,” Sasuke shifted his weight, holding him closer. “It’s okay to cry. But you have to trust me Naru, I promise, things are going to start getting better now. It’s going to be okay.”   
Naruto sniffled, breathing deep and finding that for once, he was actually able to calm himself down. His tears were slowing.   
So they sat in silence for a few minutes, and Naruto found himself listening to the sound of Sasuke’s breathing. It was comforting. “Sasuke are things...really going to be okay now?”   
“Yes,” Sasuke said softly, “I promise, Naru please, you don’t have to live in fear anymore. I’m here.”   
“Thank you,” Naruto said, almost choking on his words. “I don’t know...I don’t know how much longer I could have faced that.”   
“Shhh, don’t worry about it now. It will be okay.” Sasuke held him closer. “Just breathe. There’s plenty of time left in lunch, don’t worry about anything else. I’m here.”   
So Naruto finally let himself relax. He let himself trust Sasuke. Because something in him did trust Sasuke.   
He breathed in, letting himself just breathe. I’m...I’m okay. He realized. It’s going to be alright.   
And finally, he thought of something else. “Sasuke…” He bit his lip, a bit nervous. “..who else knows? Does...does my dad know?”   
Sasuke hesitated. “I’m...I’m sorry Naru.” He was quiet. “He knows about the bullying by now. Nothing else.”   
Naruto took a deep breath. “No...no don’t be sorry, please. I don’t know when I’ll tell him about everything else, but I wanted to at least tell him about the bullying. I’m..I’m glad you guys told him. I don’t know if I would have been able to.”   
“Shh, it’s okay. He’ll understand. He loves you Naru, he just wants to be there for you.” Sasuke looked him in the eyes. “It’s going to be okay.”   
Naruto nodded weakly, taking a shaky breath. “I...I know. Just...I…” He felt his voice breaking and Sasuke pull him close again. “I didn’t want to break his heart like that Sasuke. He’s so happy here, with Kakashi...and he was so happy when I said I was happy here and...I am happy here. Part of me was afraid he’d take me to a different school, and I didn’t want to lose...all of you.”   
“It’s okay. We’ll explain every to Iruka, okay? You won’t have to lose us, I promise. Things are going to start to get better now.” Sasuke looked him in the eye then. “Promise me, if anything ever happens like this again, you’ll tell me?” Naruto nodded and Sasuke pulled him back close. “But...I promise...we won’t let anything like that happen again.”   
Naruto just let himself breathe, and he found he really did trust Sasuke’s words. And then he looked up, meeting his eyes and moving back slightly. And he somehow found himself to faintly smile.   
That was the first really genuine smile he had in months. No doubt it was a smile burdened with pain, but all real smiles are.   
“Sasuke...thank you.” He finally said. “I think...I think...I’m going to be able to get through this now. I’m...I’m alright. I’m...I’m okay now.” He breathed a sigh of relief, leaning back a bit. I’m...okay. 

Sasuke walked with him down the halls, for the most part, deserted for lunch. “Are you sure you’re alright?” He said with a look of concern.   
Naruto smiled, seeing Iruka walking down the hallway in the distance, towards the office they had been walking too. “Yeah. I think I need to talk to him alone for a bit though.”   
“Okay...hey, you’re alright.”   
Naruto nodded. “I know. But I need to talk to him.”   
So he walked over, a bit out of earshot from Sasuke and everyone else.   
Iruka saw him, a look of relief mixed with worry washing over him, and before he knew it he was practically running to Naruto, wrapping in his arms.   
“I’m...so...sorry…” Iruka was fighting back tears now.  
Naruto wrapped an arm around his dad, fighting back tears again. “It’s okay dad,” He said with a shaky breath. “It’s going to be okay now. I have Sasuke and the others, I’ll be alright now. And I have you and everyone else.”   
“Are you sure Naruto?” Iruka took a step back, looking him in the eyes seriously. “I’m sure I can try to get you into a different school and away from all that and--”  
“No,” Naruto’s voice was a little more confident, but at the same time desperate. “I can’t leave here. Sasuke and the others...I think...I might have a chance at really...really being friends with them. It would be so nice, to have some real friends. I can’t lose that. We’re both much happier here, you know it.”   
Iruka softly smiled, almost smiling to hold back the tears. “It’s going to be okay now, I promise. I’m so sorry I didn’t see what was going on, I thought something might be up, but I should have seen. When your friends came to tell me...I didn’t even want to believe it. I’m sorry you had to face that all again.”   
“It’s okay dad, it’s alright now.” Naruto pulled him back into a hug. He was crying now. “It’s not your fault. If it’s anyone’s fault it’s mine--”  
“No...no Sunshine don’t ever think that.” Iruka brushed his hair softly. “Nothing about that could ever be your fault.”   
Naruto let himself feel safe in his dad’s embrace. “Thank you, dad. Thank you.”   
“Of course Naruto. I will always be here for you. I’m just so sorry you had to go through that. Are you...are you okay now?”   
Naruto smiled, stepping back a bit. And he nodded. “Yeah. I’m going to be okay now.”   
Iruka glanced at the clock with a half-muttered curse. “I’m really sorry Naruto I need to get ready for my next class are you alright? I mean I can ask Kakashi to cover the jr.high class…”   
He shook his head, glancing over at Sasuke, who was waiting over by a trophy case out of earshot. “No, it’s okay. I’m okay.”   
Iruka smiled, pulling him into a final hug. “We’re here for you Naruto.”   
“I know…” Naruto walked back over to Sasuke, with a real, genuine, smile. He looked at the trophies Sasuke was studying. “You know, that’s going to be us soon.”   
Sasuke smiled, putting an arm around Naruto’s shoulder, almost before either of them realized what was happening. “State, here we come.”   
The trophies were band trophies. The last time they had won state, eight years ago. And everyone was determined to bring home a new trophy this year.   
Naruto smiled. I’m a part of something here. I belong here. I matter. I’m...I’m okay. Everything’s going to get better now, I have to believe that.


	19. Chapter 18: Friendship

Chapter 18: Friendship  
Sasuke walks home with Naruto, no one tries anything. Talk.  
“Hey, Naruto!” Sasuke said, walking over to him as they finished band practice for the day. Naruto smiled when he saw him, turning away from laughing at something Kiba had said. It made Sasuke happy to see him smiling, although he also noticed Naruto looked just a little uncomfortable with the group.  
He understood though. Naruto needed time, it hadn’t even been half a day by now. And he was prepared to be patient because he understood that.  
“Hello, Sasuke.” Naruto returned the smile.  
“So, Iruka told me he’s not going to be able to give you a ride home tonight,” Sasuke said softly.  
Naruto rubbed his neck nervously. “Yeah...I mean I was going to walk...like I normally do...I mean, I do like the walk.”  
“I can walk home with you if you want,” Sasuke offered. “Gaara and Lee have some family thing they’ve got to go to, but Keira and Kotone said they’d tag along too if you wanted.”  
He saw Naruto gulp a bit, biting his lip. “Um...are you sure? I mean, you all live in different directions right? I...I don’t want to be a bother.”  
“Hey,” Sasuke put a hand on his shoulder. “You’re never a bother Naruto. I usually take the bus anyways, and there’s a bus stop near your house. It’s no bother.”  
Naruto swallowed, closing his eyes with a sigh of relief finally. “Thank you…” He said finally, quietly, his voice almost breaking. “I was...I was worried when Iruka told me he had that staff meeting after practice.”  
“You know you can always ask me or one of the others to walk you home right?” Sasuke said softly, part of him wanting to hug Naruto. “It’s no bother.”  
Naruto glanced around, visibly uncomfortable there might be someone listening. Finally, he turned back to him. “I’m worried that would happen if he did try something, and some of you got hurt trying to help me Sasuke. Sometimes it seems he has half the football team with him.”  
Sasuke felt that anger boiling in his veins again; if he had run into Liam that day at school he wouldn’t have been able to stop himself from attacking him. As it was, at least Liam, Charlotte, Isaac, and Finn were all suspended, probably looking at being expelled.  
His heart hurt thinking about that afternoon when they had called Naruto into the principals to talk about it. His heart hurt remembering Naruto begging him to come with him. “I can’t do this alone Sasuke, please?” Of course he went with Naruto then. “A seven nation army couldn’t hold me back Naru.”  
Naruto’s accounts of what had happened almost made him sick to his stomach. And he could tell, Naruto was glossing things over. But even what he said glossing it over was enough to get the bullies in big trouble.  
“Naruto, don’t worry about that,” Sasuke said finally, trying to keep his voice steady. “Keira, Kotone, Gaara and Lee are basically ninjas.”  
Naruto smiled to himself almost. “It...it was nice finally having someone stand up for me the other day.” He finally choked out.  
“Hey,” Sasuke said, putting his arm back on Naruto’s shoulder. The way he still winced at physical contact made part of Sasuke’s heart break.“Don’t worry about it. We’re here for you okay?”  
“Okay.” 

“You guys sure you’re alright from here?” Kotone asked again, as they moved to turn towards the street that would take them to Keira’s house.  
“Yeah,” Naruto nodded. “Thank you for taking it out of your way to walk this far with us.”  
Sasuke walked in silence beside Naruto for a while. It was exactly a bad silence though, it was comfortable. He got the sense that Naruto trusted him, at least to some degree. And that was more he could have ever hoped for.  
You’re such a good person, you know that? If you would just see it, you could be an amazing leader. There are few people out there who can go through so much, and yet still come out the other side so kind. I know this isn’t over yet, you need time to heal. But we’ll be with you every moment.  
“Hey, Sasuke?” Naruto said finally, a bit nervous. Sasuke had noticed how he kept glancing around like every shadow was about to jump out and attack them almost.  
“Yeah Naru?”  
Naruto looked over at him, almost in confusion. “Why did you guys care when Tom told you? I’m trying to rationalize everything to my brain I’m sorry I just...”  
Sasuke put a hand on his shoulder, wincing as Naruto flinched slightly. “We wouldn’t want anyone to have to go through all of that. No one deserves that, and especially not you. You’re part of the band, you’re practically family to all of us, okay? Don’t ever forget that.”  
Once you see the difference between a genuine and forced smile, you’ll never forget it. “Thank you, Sasuke,” Naruto said quietly, looking up at the sky for a moment. His smile broadened. “Doesn’t the sky look pretty?”  
Sasuke glanced up, confused. It seemed a snowstorm was threatening again, the sky was filled with grey clouds. He couldn’t see how that was pretty exactly. “What do you mean? It’s all filled with grey clouds.”  
Naruto shook his head. “Look at it though, how the sun's shining through them? It’s not just grey clouds.”  
So Sasuke looked. And he saw what Naruto meant. There were layers to it, depth. The sun, approaching the mountain soon, still shone through them. It really was pretty, no, beautiful really.  
Sasuke smiled at Naruto. “I never would have noticed that.”  
Naruto grinned. “Neither would I have probably. I’ve been too worried about everything else to notice things like that.”  
“You don’t have to worry anymore,” Sasuke said, hesitating even though he wanted to give him a hug. “I promise.”  
“I know, thank you.”Naruto stopped, turning to an apartment build. “Well, thank you again for walking with me.”  
“You don’t have to thank me Naruto,” Sasuke smiled and waved. “I’ll see you tomorrow!”  
You know Naruto, Sasuke thought, walking off to the nearby bus stop. I wonder if I could convince you to try out for drum major this spring. Shikamaru said he wants to step down from it next year since it will be his senior year and he wants to focus on other things. You and I could make a good team as drum majors for our junior and senior years. Maybe I’ll mention it to you someday. Sasuke smiled up at the sky. It really is beautiful. 

Afternote from ABlackRaven and Konkyatto: If you have never heard Seven Nation Army, and thus did not get the joke, you must have been living under a rock. Please go search it up on youtube. Also, be aware on the other sites this gets uploaded on all the thoughts are in italics, A03 is weird and won't do that when we copy/paste the story over. So that's why that is weird.Sorry about that.


	20. Chapter 19: Bonds

Chapter 19: Bonds  
Naruto glanced over at Sasuke, sitting down next to him. Usually, the seat next to Naruto remained empty. It wasn’t like they had a seating chart in History exactly, but less than a month away from Winter Break you didn’t change where you had been sitting all year. You just..didn’t. That was almost a rule.   
“What are you doing?” Naruto leaned a bit forward in his chair, a little uncomfortable.   
“Sitting down,” Sasuke said firmly, getting out his book.   
Naruto put a hand on Sasuke’s book, getting him to turn and look at him. “But I mean why, why are you sitting next to me. You know...you don’t have to do that.”   
Sasuke turned to look at him, slightly frowning. “I’m sitting next to you because I want to Naruto.”  
“But aren’t you worried…” Naruto glanced around, his voice catching a bit with anxiety, “What people will think if you’re sitting near me? I mean Liam’s...Liam’s going to make sure everyone knows before too long..” That was a thought he had been trying to avoid.   
Sasuke put a hand on his shoulder, gently. Naruto was glad he managed not to flinch this time. “Hey, it’s okay. I don’t care what anyone thinks; if they’re going to give you crap about it their opinion doesn’t matter anyway. Okay?”  
Naruto stared for a moment, a pleasant feeling of relief almost stabbing him in the heart. “O...Okay. Thank you.”   
Sasuke smiled, shaking his head. “Don’t have to thank me, idiot.”   
Naruto smiled in return, enjoying the fact he could really smile again. And he almost laughed at the nickname.  
For once, he was able to relax and focus in History. For once the fear wasn’t just constantly nagging at the back of his mind.   
He found him glancing over at Sasuke though, the other thought that had kept him awake a bit last night coming back. Naruto shook his head a bit, trying not to think about it. I can’t have a crush on him. He’s dating Sakura right, and they look...happy. No, I should value the friendship he’s already given me. That’s more than I could have hoped for, more than I deserve. He glanced back over at Sasuke. And...I could never tell you. I’m too afraid to lose you.   
Naruto shook his head, focusing on the lesson.  
At lunch, Kiba and the other practically dragged him to lunch with him, and with Sasuke insisting as well, he couldn’t say no. They wouldn’t take no for an answer.   
He didn’t want to say no he realized. He’d never wanted to say no.   
And now he was happy he finally said yes.   
“Eat some vegetables,” Lee demanded, putting some on his tray.   
Naruto moved to protest, but Gaara interrupted him. “It’s best just to go along with it Naruto,” Gaara said with slight exasperation, putting some vegetables on his own tray. “I tried to fight it. But if you’re in this friend group, Lee makes sure you eat your vegetables.”  
Going back to the table Naruto sat between Sasuke and Keira, at their insistence. He sat there for a moment, feeling slightly awkward as everyone slipped so easily into conversation.   
“Here you go,” Keira said with a bit of a laugh, moving the vegetables off her tray and on to Naruto’s. “Lee makes everyone take them, that doesn’t mean I’m going to eat them.”   
Naruto began to protest, but again he was interrupted, this time by Kotone, leaning slightly over from where she sat on the other side of Keira. “It’s best just to take them and eat them. She usually makes me take them.”   
“...okay.” He said finally, staring at the double portion of vegetables a bit annoyed.   
“Hey,” He felt the hand on his shoulder, and part of him hated himself for flinching. It was just Sasuke. “Relax.”  
Naruto took a deep breath, trying to do just that. “I’m sorry I just…”   
Keira shook her head. “Don’t have to apologize Naruto. We understand, it’s okay. We understand.”   
Naruto smiled, feeling a little better. “Thanks.”   
“Hey look!” Someone shouted from another table. “The fag finally found the herd. Careful now, wouldn’t want them to be cursed like your parents. You going to kill them too? Well do us all a favor and just kill yourself then.”  
Naruto tensed at the words, dread sinking into him. He knew that voice. That voice had been there with Liam sometimes. He glanced over. Noah, one of the football players.   
Figures…  
Keira was standing up before he realized what was happening, so was Sasuke. Then Gaara, Lee, and Kotone.   
“Wait, guys, don’t…” Naruto trailed off.   
“You want to say that again punk?!” Keira almost shouted. “I will strangle you with your intestines and feed your heart to a crow!”  
It might have been funny if someone else said it. They might have laughed. But Keira said it with such dead seriousness, you couldn’t laugh.   
“Guys…” Naruto said, uncomfortable.   
“You okay?” Sasuke said with a frown, turning back to him.   
Naruto took a shaky breath and nodded. “Yeah...I’m...I’m okay.”   
“Do you want to go eat somewhere else?” Sasuke asked softly, a hand on Naruto’s shoulder.   
Naruto hesitated and then shook his head. “It’s kind of stupid but...I don’t want to run away I guess?”   
Sasuke shook his head, sitting back down beside him. “That’s not stupid at all Naruto.   
“Thanks.” He said, at least with a twitch of a real smile.   
Now some of the teachers were shouting at both sides to be quiet, not understanding the context or how the shouting match had begun. Kiera didn’t like it, she looked like she still wanted to go over there and brutally murder all of them, but she sat back down.   
She muttered something under her breath, and Kotone nodded in agreement.   
After that, strangely enough, Naruto relaxed just a bit and found the conversation easier. He finally came to terms with it, it didn’t matter if the whole school knew. He had...friends.   
Friends...Naruto glanced around. I like having friends.   
The double serving of vegetables wasn’t even too bad. He gave Sasuke the tomatoes though, which he didn’t seem to mind. 

Naruto was staring at the band bus window again, but now he was smiling. Today was going to be the last football game of the season that they would play at, and he couldn’t help but feel a little sad it was over. But he was happy, very happy, in light of everything that happened the past couple days.   
He saw Sasuke step on to the bus, and his smile broadened as Sasuke’s eyes met his. Sasuke waved, gesturing towards the empty seat next to Naruto.   
Naruto practically beamed as he nodded.


	21. Chapter 20: Crush

Chapter 20: Crush  
“You look worried,” Shikamaru said with a sigh, still focused on his math homework. They were about an hour out from having to head up to the band to leave for State, and both of them were nervous.   
Sasuke more so though. “I am worried,” He muttered to his best friend, glancing over from his own homework.   
Shikamaru shook his head, closing his textbook. Sasuke seriously doubted he had been putting much effort into his studying, not that he needed too. “But your biggest worry isn’t competition, is it? Come on Sasuke, you saw him Friday. You even went to his house after practice to say goodnight. It’s been less than a day. You can’t already be worried about him.”   
Sasuke glared at him. “I am worried about him.”   
“Liam couldn’t possibly get to him you know,” Shikamaru said, staring up at the ceiling. Sasuke shook his head, rubbing his temples. “And I seriously doubt he would cut right now. Relax. He’s survived these past three weeks right? He’s not going to spontaneously combust on us.”   
“I know that,” Sasuke said through half gritted teeth. “I...hope.”   
Shikamaru looked over at him and finally smiled, half a smirk. “Oh. I see what this is. Thought so.”   
Sasuke glared at him again. “What?”   
“You haven’t realized it yet yourself, have you?” Shikamaru shook his head, picking up his history book again, sitting on the other end of the couch. “Of course, figures you wouldn’t. You’ve always been a clueless idiot when it comes to things like this.”   
“What?” He glared over at his friend and fellow drum major, seriously annoyed now. “Watch who you call an idiot.”   
Shikamaru rolled his eyes a bit. “You’re being an idiot.” He sighed, setting the book down again. “Think about it Sasuke,” He said, turning to face him. “Why are you so worried about Naruto? You’ve been on edge like this the past three weeks since Tom came to talk to us that day, no actually you’ve been like this for longer. Why? Honestly ask yourself that question.”   
You’re being weird...Sasuke thought to himself, letting the silence hang in the air. And that’s when Shikamaru’s words started to bounce around his mind a bit. I’ve been worried about Naruto. I thought something might be up...wish I had realized what was going on...but he’s right that even more, I’ve been...thinking about to Naruto a lot this semester. He smiled, remembering the first day of band camp. From the moment he saw him, something in him wanted to be friends with Naruto. Wait, what? Well, I guess that answers Shikamaru’s questions.   
“I’ve just been worried about Naruto.” Sasuke finally muttered, picking his homework backup. He wanted to finish it before State, and he thought this conversation was over.   
“And why have you been worried about Naruto,” Shikamaru said, not looking away from the book.   
Sasuke glared at him. “Because I care about him. The idiot is my friend.”   
Shikamaru was visibly trying not to laugh. “‘Friend’ sure. Go with that if you want.”   
Sasuke frowned, finally realizing what he was saying. And he shook his head, trying to dismiss it. Yes, I care for him. I care about my friends. The pencil lead broke as he pushed down to hard, lost in his thoughts. If I’m being honest...I care about him...as more than a friend...don’t I? Gah, what?! Like...a crush? He frowned. Yeah...like a crush idiot. Well shoot. Took you long enough to realize. And what’s more...how are you going to tell Naruto? Are you going to tell naruto?  
“Finally realized it, have you?” Shikamaru looked over.   
“What am I going to do?” Sasuke asked with a sigh, setting down his homework. “I don’t want him to think I’m trying to help him only because I...like...him I mean that’s far from the truth...what will he thinks when I tell him…this is a headache…”   
“They say love is pain,” Shikamaru said, quite unhelpfully, turning to the next page.   
Sasuke continued to glare at him. “You’re so incredibly helpful. Seriously, what do I do? What did you say to Temari? I mean, if you’re going to call me an idiot, you have to admit you were kind of an idiot with her.”   
Shikamaru shook his head. “She asked me out first man, I don’t know if I can be much help here.”   
“Now is the time you chose to not give out your advice?” Sasuke shook his head, leaning back a bit. “I mean...I think I want to tell him.”   
“You want to tell him Sasuke. So make me a promise, you’re going to tell him. Preferable before we get back from state.”   
“That’s only a couple days!” Sasuke protested.   
“And you’ll be happier when you tell him.” Shikamaru glanced over at the clock, 7:55 on the dot. “We should get over to the band hall.”   
“Fine,” Sasuke grumbled, going to pick up his things.   
Shikamaru smirked. “Oh don’t be so glum, you know you’re excited. Plus, I know you’re going to sit by Naruto on the bus.”   
Sasuke shot him a death glare. “If you say anything...so help me I will--”  
Shikamaru cut him off, rolling his eyes. “I won’t say anything Sasuke.”  
“You better not,” Sasuke half mumbled. “Come on, let’s go.”

“You okay Sasuke?” Sasuke snapped back to reality as Naruto turned to him, looking worried. “Just nervous about the competition or…?”  
Sasuke swallowed, forcing a smile that he hoped wasn’t weird. “Yeah, I’m fine.”   
Why did you have to point out the crush now of all times Shikamaru? I don’t know if I’m going to be able to survive sitting next to him like this...you make things so difficult sometimes.   
Naruto smiled, looking back out the window. “I can’t decide if I’m more excited or nervous for state,” He admitted, looking back.   
“Don’t be nervous,” Sasuke said, almost speaking before he thought about it. That was how it was with Naruto he was realizing; Naruto brought out the best in him. He could...talk to Naruto. Really talk to him, easily. “Being nervous now will only make things worse tomorrow.”   
Naruto smiled, rubbing his neck. “Yeah...thanks. I guess I’m nervous about more than competition though.”   
Sasuke frowned. “What do you mean?”   
“Ah, nothing. Never mind.” Naruto shook his head. “Anyways...so um..how are things with you and Sakura going?”   
Sasuke blinked in surprise. “What do you mean?”   
Naruto frowned. “Aren’t you guys dating…?”  
“Oh, no. We broke up a long time ago.” Sasuke shook his head, almost laughing. And truth be told Naru...no. Not I can’t tell you that...yet.   
“Oh,” A look of sudden realization had crossed Naruto’s face. “Uh...my bad. Sorry I guess?”   
“Don’t be,” Sasuke leaned back, relaxing a bit. “It didn’t work. Very awkward actually. Turns out she’s not a bad friend though, everything works much better with us being friends.”  
“Oh,” Naruto look back out the window. “Well, that’s good I guess.”   
“What are you thinking about?” Sasuke said, again without really thinking about it.   
Naruto shook his head, leaning back. “Nothing. I’m going to try to get some sleep,” He grinned, “sorry in advance if fall over on you or anything.”   
Sasuke smiled. “Good luck on trying to sleep.”   
Sasuke looked back over at him a while later, now asleep. He looked...peaceful. Sleep well Naru...Sasuke sighed, staring out the windows of the bus. Rest easy.


	22. Chapter 21: Pizza

Chapter 21: Pizza

“Naru? Naru, wake up.” Naruto blinked awake, his stiff muscles protesting the awkward sleeping position. 

Startled, he realized they were there. The bus was pulling into the hotel, it was almost evening out. 

He turned to Sasuke, and couldn’t help but smile a bit. “How long did I sleep?” 

“Hours,” Sasuke said with a small smile. “I’ve never seen someone sleep so soundly on a bus. Have you not been sleeping well or something?” 

Naruto inwardly grimaced, thinking about the nightmares. And it wasn’t just the nightmares, the thoughts and the flashbacks followed him everywhere. He couldn’t escape them. 

But he shook his head. “No, bus rides just make me tired.”  _ Well, that’s at least not a lie. But I thought I was past not talking about this. I thought I was past half-truths.  _ He glanced back at Sasuke, a bit worried almost.  _ The nightmares, I wish I could talk to you about those. My...crush I guess, I wish I could talk to you about that too. But I’m scared of losing you.  _

Sasuke smiled as they pulled into the driveway of the hotel, “That makes sense. Come on then sleepyhead,” He grinned and stood up, grabbing his stuff. “Let’s head inside.” 

“..okay,” Naruto said softly, smiling. 

Walking into the foyer of the hotel, Naruto couldn’t help but laugh. 

Kakashi and Iruka stood in the middle of the sea of band kids, frantically trying to make some semblance of order. Something had gotten mixed up with the room keys and now some of the packets had the wrong numbers. 

Sasuke chuckled, pulling up his bags and standing beside Naruto. “Well, I guess we wait.” He said finally, a small sigh. 

Naruto frowned. “Maybe we could help? Wouldn’t it be better if went and got our room packets...well shoot,” He said, realizing something. “I never checked the list ahead of time to see who I was roomed with.” 

Sasuke grinned, at what Naruto wasn’t sure. “Oh, I feel sympathy for you Naru. He’s the most annoying guy on the planet, according to you.” 

Naruto frowned again. “Only one person? I thought it was three or four to a room.” 

“Well yeah, it is,” Sasuke smiled. “But we ended up with weird numbers this year, so umm,” He almost seemed to...blush? “So it’s just you and me.” Sasuke frowned. “The room has two beds though.” 

Naruto almost laughed at Sasuke’s sudden awkwardness. But he realized he was happy, happy he would be spending more time with...a friend. 

_ That’s more than you deserve, trash! _

He bit back a grimace as Liam’s words echoed in his ears. “Well, that’s great. Hang on though,” Naruto almost scowled at him. “I do not think you’re the most annoying guy on the planet.” 

“So you’ve only been saying that for the past three weeks as a joke?” 

Naruto grimaced. “You know I was joking…” 

Sasuke smiled, a hand on Naruto’s shoulder. And Naruto was happy, happy he didn’t flinch at all this time. He still had that problem with too many people, but with Sasuke, he was much better. “I know Naru. I was just teasing.” 

_ Teasing...jokes...that’s what friends do, right? Friends. Friends.  _ Naruto bit his tongue, trying to focus.  _ Why can’t I be happy with just friends?  _

 

“So Naruto,” Kotone leaned against the wall of the room, her arms crossed. Her, Keira, Gaara and Lee were sitting in the room they’re group had gathered in for pizza, all looking at Naruto now. The others had gone to pick up pizza. 

“Um…” Naruto fidgeted, a bit uncomfortable. “Why are you all looking at me like that?”

Keira frowned at him and then smiled. “So, crush on Sasuke eh?” 

Naruto blinked in surprise, almost flinched. He forced a laugh, rubbing his neck. “Uh...what? I...definitely have no idea what you’re talking about. No idea at all.” 

Kotone laughed, surprising him again. “You always were pretty bad at lying Naruto.” 

“What do you mean?”

“It’s obvious,” Keira said with a smile. “You’ve practically been staring at him the last three weeks. No, actually longer. You’re officially a lovestruck idiot.”

Naruto stared in horror. “Really? Gods, I’m an idiot. Do you think he knows?”

“And that’s why you’re a bad liar,” Kotone muttered, half under her breath. “Admitted it almost without thinking.”

“Probably,” Keira smiled. “But then again he’s kind of an idiot when it comes to these things too. He’s not really the type to talk much about emotions and stuff.” 

“Really?” Naruto frowned.  _ He talks with me a lot it seems… _

“It’s a bit different with you Naruto,” Kotone almost half smiled. “I think you’ll find he has similar feelings towards you.” 

Naruto stared, almost giddy with disbelief. “...really?” 

“Definitely!” Lee almost startled him out of his chair. “It is the springtime of youth, love is in abundance!”

“Anyways,” Keira said, turning back to Naruto. From the sound of it, they had retrieved the pizza and were coming back. “All we wanted to say was best of luck. We hope you figure out some way to talk to him. You should talk to him.” 

Naruto gulped, just as Sasuke opened the door with a smile. Their eyes met, two smiles holding half-contained nervousness. 

He glanced back at Keira, she smiled as if to say,  _ don’t worry about it. When you do talk to him, it’s going to be great.  _

Naruto ate his pizza almost without thinking, his mind adrift.  _ How could I ever do this? How could I ever tell him? These past three weeks have almost felt like three years, but if so they’ve been the best three years of my life. How could I risk losing that?  _

 

Sasuke sighed to himself, opening the door for the others holding pizza. 

He walked in the door, and his eyes met Naruto’s. And he couldn’t help but smile, trying to hold back the nervousness that raced in his heart like a hare running from a fire. 

He broke the eye contact, not sure if he could handle it much more. Nervously he took a box of pizza from Shikamaru. 

Shikamaru smiled at him, shaking his head just a bit.  _ You’re always an idiot when it comes to these things Sasuke.  _ He couldn’t practically hear his friend’s voice echoing in his ears.  _ You want to tell him.  _

_...but how?  _

  
  
  


Afternote: The next five days I’m going to be offline, so no chapters sorry. However, I’m uploading this chapter and the next two chapters today, to make up for it a bit. Hope you are enjoying reading! 

Also for AO3 readers, I finally figured out how to get italics. Hip Hip horah!


	23. Chapter 22: Comfort

Chapter 22: Comfort

_ Sasuke felt his blood roar in his ear and his heart pound as he ran through the empty hallway, shouting. It was dark out, just the moon shining through the window.  _

_ He was a little kid again, facing that nightmare. Darkness. He was running through the darkness of that night, desperately screaming for someone, anyone.  _

_ Sasuke knew this dream all too well. He wanted for all the world to tell himself to wake up as he walked closer to his parents’ bedroom, to stop there. He didn’t want to see what was on the other side of that door again.  _

_ But there was no helping it. He opened the door. He always opened the door.  _

_ Lightning flashed and the world seemed to spin around him as he did, feeling sick when he saw him.  _

_ Itachi. His older brother. Standing over a corpse. The light glinting off a blade stained red.  _

_ Screaming. He was screaming. No, no, no it wasn’t supposed to be that face. That was how it was, always the faces of the people he cared about. Kakashi. Keira and Kotone. All his friends at school.  _

_ And now...Naruto.  _

_ No...no he couldn’t lose him too! _

_ Fear.  _

_ Sirens. Were those sirens in the distance?  _

_ Tears. He was crying and screaming. He fell back, Itachi turning to him with a look of sorrow.  _

_ Blood. The blood burned into his memory like a stain, a stain he couldn’t get out of his eyes. Now...now it was Naruto’s blood. And that hurt most of all.  _

_ Heartbeat. Scream. Darkness. Death.  _

_ “No!” Sasuke screamed. He didn’t want to lose this. He didn’t want to lose another person he loved.  _

_ “I’m sorry...one day you’ll understand…” Haunting. Those words were haunting.  _

_ Darkness. There was no escaping it.  _

“Sasuke,” Someone was shaking him. “Sasuke!” 

He gasped, blinking back blurry vision. There was a light now, the darkness wasn’t complete.

Hotel sheets. Hotel bed. Hotel ceiling. Hotel room. His drum major uniform hanging on a rack. A hand on his shoulder. 

Sasuke was shaking, trying to stop seeing it. Trying to get the image of Naruto’s lifeless face out of his mind. But he couldn’t. A small sob escaped him, he couldn’t keep it back. 

_ No...no...no….get it out of your head it isn’t real...that’s what therapist Kakashi made you see said to do...remember...it’s not...real… _

“Sasuke?” Naruto’s voice, that was real. So...pure. So joyful. He couldn’t bear the thought of his death anymore then, how would he live without that voice? “Hey, talk to me. Please, what’s wrong? You were screaming.” 

Sasuke turned away, shame rising in him.  _ I’m pathetic. Screaming out at nightmares like a little kid. No...no...It’s not...real... _ Another sob escaped him, he couldn’t hold back the tears. 

“Sasuke, please...talk to me. I’m here for you too.” 

The lightning flashed. The blood, he couldn’t stop seeing the blood. His face, his lifeless face. He couldn't stop seeing it. 

Sasuke barely managed to grab the trash can as he threw up. 

He collapsed back on the bed, shaking.  _ Why tonight?  _

“Sasuke…” He felt the hand on his shoulder again. “What’s wrong?” 

“I’m sorry,” He choked out, barely able to talk through the tears. “I didn’t want you to have to see that. Nightmares...god...I’m pathetic.” He turned away, clenching a fist. 

“Hey,” Naruto moved closer to him, brushing hair out of his eyes. “It’s alright. I get them too. My parent’s death. The...the bullies. It’s okay. You’re...you’re no more pathetic than I am. And neither of us are pathetic.”

Sasuke moved, grabbing his hand. He needed to be able to believe that he was still here, that he was very much alive and well. 

Silence hung in the air, Sasuke trying to stop the tears.  _ I’m a disgrace...pathetic…. _ But Naruto’s words echoed in his mind.  _ Oh, Naruto... _ Sasuke looked up at him, the look of concern almost hurt to see.  _ You’re hurt so much...and yet you can find it to care about someone as pathetic as me. Endless love, you’re incredible.  _

“Are you alright?” Naruto’s words were barely a whisper. 

Sasuke glanced over at the clock.  _ 2am...I need sleep before competition, but I doubt I’ll get it.  _ He looked back over at Naruto. And he shook his head, wordless.  _ I’m...I’m not going to lie.  _

“No…” He hated it. How small and weak he sounded. He was just as helpless as he was that night, and even now he couldn’t stop thinking it, there was nothing he could do. 

There was nothing he could do for sure to make sure Naruto wouldn’t die. His life, like everyone else, hung by a string of fate that Sasuke was powerless against. He might catch a disease, or die in a car accident. All of them, all the people he cared about. He had no way to make sure they would make it through tomorrow. 

Naruto rubbed his shoulder, trying to give him a smile. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m right here. We’re at the hotel, for state band contest. Aren’t you excited for tomorrow? Focus on that. Focus on the here and now. Focus on me. We’re here, we’re safe. It’s okay.”

Sasuke breathed in, trying to focus on the hear and now. But his mind kept flicking back and forth, back and forth, he couldn’t stop it. 

There was no escaping the darkness. The screaming. The sirens. The pain and the blood. The blood. The corpses, the faces of the ones he loves-lifeless. Death and darkness. 

He couldn't even scream. Sobs just racked through his body, shaking. “I...I don’t want you to...to die Naru…please…” 

He felt Naruto pull him into his arms. And he clung to that, to him. He was shaking, breathing faster and faster, crying, but he couldn’t stop it. 

“Shh,” Naruto gently rocked back and forth, almost cradling him in his arms. “It’s okay. I’m not going to die Sasuke. You’re no more cursed than I am, right? It’s okay. It’ll be alright.” 

_ You’re right...I know you’re right...but still.  _ Sasuke clung to him, gripping tightly to his shirt. 

“Shh, it’s alright.” Naruto held him to his chest. And for once, Sasuke felt almost...safe. “I’m here.” He said, barely a whisper, his voice breaking slightly. 

“I can’t...stop seeing it Naruto.” He said finally, managing to slow his breathing a bit finally. And the tears had stopped. “I don’t...I don’t want you to die.” 

“I’m not going to die,” Naruto said softly, brushing his hair. “I promise. I’m right here. Focus on right now. Focus on me. Tomorrow, tomorrow we’re going to go win state. Focus on that.” 

“Oh...okay.” Sasuke breathed, a shaky sigh of relief almost. They sat there in the silence, Sasuke just glad Naruto was there for him. If he wasn’t there, Sasuke didn’t know what he would have done. Finally, he glanced at the clock. “You...you should get some sleep Naru.” 

Naruto smiled softly, letting him lay down. “You sure you’re alright now?” 

Sasuke nodded, fighting back the tears again as Naruto moved to stand out. His hand shot out, unconsciously grabbing Naruto’s. “Stay…” He hated how desperate he sounded. But he was desperate at that point. “Please?” 

Naruto hesitated a moment, but finally laid down next to him, wrapping an arm around him under the covers. “It’s okay Sasuke. I’m here. Just focus on that.” 

Sasuke looked over at him, trying to smile. “I’m sorry Naru...I shouldn’t have woken you up.” 

Naruto smiled, wiping away the last of his tears. “It’s alright Sasuke, I couldn’t sleep anyways. I didn’t want to relive everything Liam did again tonight. But now, now I might be able to sleep a bit. Let’s both of us do that okay? We need to get some sleep.” Sasuke’s heart broke to think of what Naruto must have been afraid of seeing. 

Sasuke nodded, closing his eyes. “Thank you.” 

“Y..yeah, anytime. Always.” 


	24. Chapter 23: Always

Chapter 23: Always

Kakashi pulled them all together, standing upon a makeshift podium. They were in the waiting area, the band before them had just headed into the dome. It was time; this was it. This was what everything had building up to. 

Sasuke glanced over at Naruto, sharing a brief smile. Strangely enough, he was well rested when they woke up that morning. 

“I don’t think any of you need me to explain the importance of today,” Kakashi began, smiling in his Kakashi way. “We’ve all worked towards toward this point for a long time. There’s um...no time like the present, I guess.” 

Sasuke smiled. This was always how Kakashi’s pep talks were. 

“The next generation will always surpass the previous one, that has always be true. One day it will be time for the next generation of the Konoha Shinobi band to grow beyond you, but now is your time.” Kakashi smiled, and Sasuke almost knew his next words before he spoke them.“Remember this, in competition, in life, there are rules. Those who break rules are trash. Those who abandon their friends are worse than trash. And we go on to that field as friends, and comrades, as family. What happens on that field doesn’t matter so much though, because we are a family on and off the field. That is what I am truly proud of.”

Sasuke smiled. It was almost cheesy, but somehow coming from Kakashi, it wasn’t cheesy. 

They raised the Unison Sign, if not a bit nervous, still strong. And then he told them to relax for a few minutes, the other band had only just now gone on to the field. 

There was something about that moment that took Sasuke completely off guard. Maybe it was that energy you got right before a good show, combined with that magic of competition. Whatever it was, it just struck him in that moment. 

Naruto was laughing with some of the others in the percussion section, having set his quads down for the moment. He was laughing and smiling. He was happy. 

And Sasuke realized that made him very happy, to see Naruto happy. 

_ I’m a lovestruck idiot... _ He thought walking over before he even consciously thought about it.  _ But...I want to tell him. I want him to know how much I care about him.  _

The other school’s band had just gone onto the field, so Sasuke figured he had plenty of time. So he walked over and waved to Naruto. 

Naruto waved back, still laughing. “Hey, Sasuke.” 

He hesitated for a moment, and then almost lost in the moment completely, he spoke without thinking. “Can I...Can I talk to you for a minute Naruto?” 

Naruto blinked for a moment but nodded, waving to others and walking over to him. They continued on a bit out of earshot of the others. “Yeah, what’s up? I mean...I had something I wanted to talk to you about too.” 

Sasuke faltered in surprise too.  _ What’s going on Naruto?  _ “Liam and the others aren’t--”

“No,” Naruto said immediately, cutting him off. “I promised I would tell you if something like that happened again. It’s nothing bad...I guess….just something I want to tell you...I guess.” 

“Well then what is it?” 

“Didn’t you have something you wanted to talk about though?” Naruto smiled. “You go first then.” 

_ Damn you Naruto what’s going on what do you want to tell me?!  _ Sasuke shook his head. “No, I insist. You seem worried about it. Tell me, what’s wrong?” 

Naruto blushed, surprising Sasuke again. “Nothing’s wrong Sasuke. I just…I just…” He shook his head, biting his lip. “I’m sorry I’m having a hard time saying it I’m just worried what you'll say...I’m sorry.”

Sasuke’s expression softened, and he put an arm on Naruto’s shoulder. “Hey, don’t be sorry, it’s okay. I promise I won’t be mad or anything. I told you before, I could never hate you Naru. Don’t worry. Whatever it is,” He smiled, “It’s alright.”

“I...I like you Sasuke.” Naruto stammered out finally. “As...as...as more than a friend.” 

Sasuke felt himself lurch with surprise. He felt...giddy almost. He didn’t even know what to say, he was almost too happy to speak. “Naruto…I...” 

He stumbled back, shaking a bit. It reminded Sasuke of the first day he met Naruto, he’d been so scared. “I’m sorry you probably feel really awkward now and I shouldn’t have put that on you I’m sorry…” Naruto was cut off as Sasuke pulled him into a hug, not caring it was slightly awkward with the band uniforms on. 

“Naruto…” Sasuke felt himself smiling, nearly crying. “I do too. That was what I wanted to tell you.” 

They stood there for a moment, both of them completely lost in the moment. Both of them nearly crying. “Oh…” Naruto said finally, his voice a bit weak. He moved slowly and then wrapped his arms around Sasuke in return. 

Sasuke held him close for a minute, firmly determined that he would never let anyone ever hurt him again and that he would never let Naruto go another minute of his life thinking he wasn’t loved. “Shh…” He realized Naruto was really crying a bit, and he was too. “It’s okay now. There’s no reason to cry.” 

Naruto looked up then, and their eyes met. “Thank you, Sasuke.” 

Sasuke held him close again. “Thank you too, Naru.” He smiled. The whole world seemed to far away to matter, Orochimaru was a distant nightmare.“Everything’s going to be alright now. I’ve got you, I’m here.” 

Naruto smiled, nodding. “I know. And...I’m here for you too you know.” 

_ Oh, Naruto. I love you so much.  _ “Thank you.” He grinned, “The other’s will probably start noticing how long we’ve been gone. And we need to get on the field soon.” 

Reluctantly Naruto let go a little, stepping back just a bit. “Okay…” 

Sasuke smiled and put an arm around Naruto’s shoulder as they walked back, pulling him close again. “Hey. I’m still right here.” 

“Thank you,” Naruto said, walking a little closer to Sasuke.

_ Always Naruto. Always. _

Sasuke marched onto the field, directors in front of him, band behind him, color guard flanking them. And he gasped as he saw the inside of the dome. He hadn’t quite comprehended how you could have a field indoors, it was almost too big. 

Of course, however breathtaking it was, he realized it was nothing compared to what had just happened with Naruto. 

Sasuke let go a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding during the performance. It was perfect, everything was perfect. And then he looked down slightly, remembering Naruto ended the show not too far from where he was standing. Their eyes met. 

And they smiled. 

And Sasuke just knew it, with that they had to have won state. But that seemed inconsequential. He had never been happier, because to meet those eyes with that look, meant the world.  _ I love you Naruto. Always. Always.  _


	25. Chapter 24: Happy.

Chapter 24: Happy. 

Anticipation hung in the air of the stadium. Dozens of bands stood waiting, hanging to the words coming over the speakers. They collectively held their breath, almost without realizing it. 

All the performances for the day were finished. Who had won was set in stone, and it was soon to be announced. There was nothing anyone could do now but wait. 

They stood on the field at attention in uniform with the other nine bands that had been called up for finals. Naruto thought he had been nervous before when the finalists were announced and called down to the field. That had been nothing compared to this. 

Iruka’s words came back to him though, “No matter what Naruto, remember I’m proud of you.” 

Naruto smiled a bit, looking up at where Sasuke stood at the head of their band on the field.  _ And no matter what,  _ he thought,  _ I couldn’t be happier right now.  _

He remembered the flood of relief that had come over him earlier that morning and almost felt himself go weak in the knees. No matter what, that had made him more nervous than any competition. 

_ Whatever the results,  _ He thought, glancing around at the rest of the band.  _ For the first time, I’m really a part of something _ .  _ I am happy.  _

Kiera glanced over at Naruto from where they stood with the percussion, catching his eye. She smiled, and he smiled back. And then she glanced back at Kotone, grabbing her hand. 

And then suddenly Keira was grabbing the hand of the person on her left. And Kotone was grabbing another person’s hand. More and more of them were holding hands, people who knew each other only through band and only distantly. The ends of the lines reached band to hold the person behind them. 

All in silence. 

Naruto smiled as he held their hands, really smiled. Sasuke and Shikamaru took a step back to reach the hands at the front. Kakashi and Iruka joined too. 

The Fighting Shinobi Band of Konoha high school stood together, waiting with the other bands for the final results. They stood together, as a band, as a family, taking strength from each other, believing in each other. 

“We’d like to recognize all the bands here today, all the wonderful bands in this state that these finalists represent. Please, show them your appreciation.” The crowd erupted in cheers, leaping to their feet. Some of the nervousness left the air. “Today’s awards,” The announcer paused to quiet the crowd. “Today’s awards will be presented by the state director of music…” Naruto breathed, trying to relax as he rattled of names. 

“And now, the results of this year’s State Marching Competition.” Everyone held their breath. “In tenth place, congratulations to…” 

Tenth place, not them. 

Ninth place, not them. 

Eighth place, not them. 

Naruto was beginning to feel almost light-headed, nearly sick to his stomach. With every pacing second his excitement grew. 

Seventh place, not them. 

Sixth place, not them. 

Fifth place them. 

By this point Naruto was almost clinging to the hands he held to hold himself up. 

Fourth place...not them. 

_ We at least medaled... _ He felt almost giddy, and couldn’t relax enough to breathe properly. 

“Third place, and today’s bronze medalist,  Iwagakure Stone Band.” Not them. 

_ Second or first….that’s all there is left… _

“Second place, today’s silver medalist, Kumogakure Lightning Band.” 

Naruto and the rest of the band were about ready to collapse. The rush as he realized what this meant coursed through his veins. 

“And now,” Silence hung in the stadium. “This year’s gold medalist and State Marching Band champion, congratulation to the Konoha Shinobi Band!” 

Cheers erupted through the stadium and they started raising the unison sign, almost too happy to believe it was really happening. 

Sasuke looked back towards Naruto, the drum major medal shining on his chest. Their eyes met and then Sasuke was running towards him and they were hugging, not caring about the awkwardness of the uniforms, just as everyone around them did the same. 

“We did it,” Naruto finally said, not even embarrassed he was tearing up. “We...we actually did it.” 

Sasuke smiled, meeting his eyes and pulled him back into the hug. “Of course we did. With all the bad things that have happened, eventually, something had to go right.” 

Naruto grinned at him, so happy he could really smile again.  _ Maybe I really can heal from everything that has happened.  _ “I believed in us. All of us. It just feels so...unreal almost.” 

“It’s real, trust me.” Keira and Kotone were walking over as they all continued to celebrate. “Feeling this happy has to be real.”

“Yeah,” Naruto looked back at Sasuke, smiling. “I guess you’re right.” Seeing Iruka out of the corner of his eye, smiling and talking to Kakashi he waved. “Hang on guys, I’ll be right back.” 

He ran over to his dad, and almost knocked him over with the hug. 

“Whoa, Naruto, you alright? Hey, hey, I’m so proud of you kiddo.” 

“Thank you for moving us here dad,” Naruto said, trying not the cry. “I’m finally really happy again.” 

Kakashi pulled them together again after they got off the field, and they could all tell he was somewhat at a loss for words. “I...I don’t know what to say. We did it. Give yourselves another round of applause.” 

They happily complied. 

 

Naruto sat next to Sasuke as they laughed and ate dinner with the others at the buffet, as happy as happy could be. He loved seeing his friends so happy, he loved being so happy. 

Everything was perfect it seemed. Keira and Kotone were happily sharing their food, they always seemed to do that. Gaara was smiling as Lee got into a who-can-eat-the-weirdest-thing-dipped-in-chocolate contest with Kiba. Kankuro was smiling, watching Kiba. Hinata was sitting with Shino and Neji. Sakura and Ino had gotten over their latest argument and were laughing as friends should be, eating with Sai. Shikamaru and Temari sat across from Sasuke and Naruto. And Kakashi and Iruka sat at a table together, smiling. 

Everyone was smiling. Everyone was happy. 

Naruto leaned back with a sigh. “This is perfect.” 

Sasuke smiled too, looking over at him. He reached over, lacing his fingers through Naruto’s. Naruto felt a spark of happiness at the touch, a simple gesture that meant so much. “It really is perfect.” 

Shikamaru rolled his eyes and Temari shook her head with a slight grin. “You guys are both love-sick idiots. But you’re cute idiots, so it’s okay.” 

 

Afternote: Sorry for the short break. Updates should be back to a chapter every 1-2 days. Hope you’re enjoying reading!


	26. Chapter 25: Moving Forward

Chapter 25: Moving Forward

Naruto fiddled with the hem of his shirt, waiting in his room for Sasuke to arrive. He was excited and oddly nervous. It still brought a smile to his lips every time he thought about it, asking Sasuke if they could go on a date together. And he had said yes.

And Naruto couldn’t be happier.

 _I like being happy again,_ He thought. _And I can deal with the nightmares._

He heard the knock at the door and rushed to get it before Iruka.

“Hey,” Sasuke smiled as Naruto opened the door.  

“Hey,” Naruto said, returning the small hug.

“You ready to tell him?” Sasuke’s voice was soft, caring.

He nodded. “Yeah. We’ll tell him, and then we’ll go on the date, and everything is going to be perfect.”

Sasuke smiled again. “It’s good to see you so optimistic about life Naru. Really...makes me happy.”

 _Makes me happy too Sasuke._ Naruto smiled, gesturing for him to follow. They walked to Iruka’s bedroom, and Naruto frowned as he felt himself hesitate slightly. Sasuke glanced at him worriedly, nodding encouragingly.

So he took a deep breath and knocked. “Uh...dad? Can we talk for a minute?”

Iruka came to the door in a moment, smiling. “Of course Naruto, what’s up? Oh, hi Sasuke when did you get here?”

“Um…” Naruto glanced at Sasuke, taking comfort in his encouraging smile. “So, we just uh...wantedtotellyouwe’redating.” He mumbled, cursing himself for getting so anxious.

Iruka frowned. “What? I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you. Hey, Naruto, whatever it is, it’s fine, you know that right?”

“Sasuke and are dating.” Naruto looked up, blurting it out. “And...we’re about to go on a date. So um...yeah.”

Iruka blinked and then smiled. He almost laughed, and then pulled Naruto into a brief hug, ruffling his hair. “Oh Naruto, I knew that. You don’t think Kakashi and I put you guys together at state by coincidence right? I’m happy for you kiddo.”

Naruto smiled, frowning at the same time. “What? Okay, I’m not even going to ask about the room assignments,” He hesitated, “Thanks, dad.”

Iruka nodded. “You’re welcome Naruto, have fun. I’m going to finish up some work, be back before it gets too late okay?”

“Okay, I promise.” Naruto grinned as he turned to Sasuke, the door closing behind him.

Sasuke returned the smile, pulling Naruto into a half-hug as they walked. “Excited?” He asked with a grin.

“More than you could know Sasuke,” Naruto pulled on his coat, even though it was actually wasn’t that cold today. _It’ll be colder earlier. Besides, this way...no don’t think about that_. “Where are we going? You never actually told me.”

“You alright?” Sasuke looked concerned over at him, noticing the jacket. “Hey, Naru, look at me.” Naruto looked up, hesitant to meet his eyes. Sasuke grabbed his hand, pulling him closer into a hug. “You don’t have to feel ashamed about wearing a jacket. You’re the most amazing person I know and nothing could change that.”

“Thank you,” Naruto said, trying not to cry. _I suppose to be better now, right? There’s nothing to be afraid of anymore._ He felt himself relax, trusting that Sasuke was there.

“Shh, you don’t have to thank me. Come on, let’s go to the car. We’re going to go eat dinner and then go see a movie, it’ll be great.”

Naruto smiled, following him out the door. “Yeah. It going to be great.”

 

Sasuke drove them to dinner, and Naruto had to laugh when he saw it. “Ichiraku’s? You sure? I thought you didn’t like ramen.”

“It’s grown on me since I met you,” Sasuke admitted. “And you claimed this is the best place for ramen in town. So I thought I should see for myself.”

Naruto couldn’t stop smiling as they sat down and ordered. “This...this really is great.” He blushed slightly, trying to hide it by looking at the menu again, even though he knew he’d get the same thing he always got.

Sasuke grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers again. And Naruto felt his nervousness melt away.

 _Am I a bit afraid someone will see us? Yeah, maybe a bit. I wouldn’t want this to be ruined by someone saying something ruined._ His eyes met Sasuke’s. _No, this is too perfect to ruin._

The waiter actually smiled when she saw them. “What can I get for you this evening gentlemen?”

They made their order and ate, Sasuke pleasantly surprised to find the ramen was actually quite good.

Naruto grinned and raised his glass of water. “A toast to the state marching champions, the Fighting Shinobi Band, and their amazing drum major.”

Sasuke raised his glass to meet Naruto’s with a small clink, chuckling slightly. “And to their amazing quad player.”

He blushed. “I did practically nothing, but thanks.”

Sasuke shook his head. “Nonsense, everyone in band is important, you know that. And you really helped pull the band together this season, even if you don’t see it. That reminds me, what would you say to trying out for drum major this spring?”

Naruto looked up in surprise, meeting Sasuke eyes. He looked...hopeful. “Um...I mean I dunno I don’t think I’m that good really um…”

“I mean, don’t feel pressured Naruto, sorry,” Sasuke smiled, “You’re a fantastic quad player, our number one hyperactive drummer. I just thought you might be interested. Shikamaru’s stepping down next season, and it would be fun if you and I were both drum majors.”

Naruto smiled, thinking about it. _I never considered it seriously before but..._ He remembered being in sixth-grade band, back at his old school and looking up to the drum majors in high school. Of course, the bullies there had made him think he never could follow that, but he’d never lost the dream at the back of his mind. _Maybe it could be more than a dream…_ “I think I will actually,” Naruto said, almost feeling surerer of it by saying it aloud. “Try out I mean. It would be fun.”

Sasuke grinned. “Really?! You...you don’t know how happy I am to hear that. You’re such a good person, the type of person a drum major should be.”

Naruto blushed again, feeling flattered. “T-thanks.”

Sasuke glanced at his watch, muttering a curse. “We should go, if we’re not careful we won’t have time to get to the movie.”

 

 _That...that was all...perfect..._ Naruto sighed happily as he closed the door behind him. He was a little sad to have hugged Sasuke goodnight, but he knew he’d see him tomorrow. It was winter break by now.

Outside, soft snow has begun to fall, blanketing the world in a peaceful quiet.

A momentary stab of anxiety hit him hard as he thought about it, Sasuke was driving. _No, no he’ll be alright. He said he got snow studs on his tires anyways. He’ll be alright._

Naruto laid down, happily content to go to sleep.

The nightmares snuck up on him like a wolf on its prey.


	27. Chapter 26: Nightmares

Chapter 26: Nightmares

 

The sound of his phone ringing woke him up, out of a dream he couldn’t quite remember. At least it wasn’t a nightmare, ever since state band he’d had fewer of those. He reached for the phone blindly, wincing as Aoda hissed in protest. The clock read 1 am. 

_ Who the bloody hell is calling me this early?! This better be important… _ Through blurry eyes he squinted at the contact name and his heart skipped a beat.  _ “Naru.”  _ Just Naru. Everyone else in his phone was put down by full first and last name, but Naruto was Naru. 

“Naru…” Sasuke whispered, picking up the phone without hesitation and sitting up in bed. “Naru, what’s wrong?” The only sounds coming from the other side of the line were muffled sobs. “Naru, baby, talk to me.” 

Sasuke was already out of bed and getting dressed before he realized what he was doing. 

“Sasuke…” Naruto’s voice finally came through. “I don’t know I’m sorry it was just a stupid nightmare. Iruka isn’t here and I just...I’m sorry I shouldn’t have woken you up.” 

“It’s okay, just keep talking to me Naru, please.” Sasuke continued, holding the phone even as he scrambled to get dressed. “I’m coming over.” 

“Oh…” Naruto was trying to hold back tears, Sasuke could tell. “You don’t have to do that I mean it’s so late out…it was snowing earlier...you don’t have to...”

“No Naruto, I’m coming over,” Sasuke said firmly, grabbing the keys to his seldom-used car and rushing out the door, barely remembering to lock it. “Stay on the phone, I’m here. Just focus on my voice.” 

Naruto hesitated. “...thank you.” He said finally, trying to hold back another sob. “But if you’re driving...please hang up. I couldn’t bear it if you got in an accident because of me.” 

Sasuke scowled, closing the car door. “You listen to me Naruto, I’m coming over. I will be there soon, you remember that okay?” 

“Yeah,” Naruto’s voice broke. “I’m sor--”

“Shh, you don’t have to apologize,” Sasuke said softly, pulling out of the parking garage. “I’ll be there soon Naru, I promise.” 

The silence after hanging up the phone was unbearable. And he could only imagine how Naruto must have felt. 

_ Liam, I hope you rot in hell.  _ He thought to himself. 

When he got there he rushed up to their apartment, and then hesitated at the door, bracing himself. And then he knocked, trying to steady his breathing. 

Naruto opened the door, still fighting from crying. He looked up, seeing Sasuke. “Sasuke…” He collapsed and Sasuke caught him, cradling in his arms. 

“Shh,” Sasuke closed the door behind them, letting Naruto cry into his shoulder. “I’m here now. I’m here now.” Naruto was hyperventilating, that much he could tell. “Naruto, focus on me. You’ve got to slow your breathing okay? I’m here. I’m here.” 

“Can’t...breathe…” Naruto gasped out.

“Naruto look at me, please. You’re okay. I’m here.” 

He did look up at him finally then, still breathing way to fast. “Can’t...breathe…” He was sobbing, trying not to, but unable to stop.

“Shh…” He could hear his voice breaking. Sasuke picked him up finally, moving back to Naruto’s room. He lay down on the bed with him, cradling him in his arms. “Breath Naruto. With me, in..and out. In...and out. There you go, just like that. Shh. In...and out.” 

Naruto was finally slowing his breathing a bit, listening to Sasuke. But he was still shaking, still crying. 

“I can’t escape it Sasuke…” Naruto said finally. “I can’t escape the nightmares. I know I’m safe now, but I just can’t escape it.” 

“It’s…” Sasuke trailed off.  _ No, no this isn’t okay. Nothing about this has ever been okay. What happened was wrong, it will never be “okay”.  _ “I’m sorry Naru. It’s not fair, it’s horribly wrong, that this happened. I’m sorry I can’t do more for you.” He brushed hair out of Naruto’s eyes, resting his forehead on Naruto’s. “I’m here Naru.” 

Naruto was clutching his shirt, almost as he was afraid he might disappear. Sasuke pulled him closer, wishing he could do more. 

“I thought I was getting better now…” Naruto said, almost a whimper. 

Sasuke hesitated, rubbing his back, trying to get him to calm down as best he could. He wasn’t sure if he would just make this worse. “Do you want to talk about it Naru?” 

Naruto laid his head on Sasuke’s chest, barely nodding. “I...I need to talk about it. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be putting this on you it’s my burden.” 

“Oh no…” Sasuke said softly, brushing his hair with his fingers. “You’re never a burden Naruto. Never a burden. You can tell me anything.”

“I don’t even know where to start Sasuke.” Naruto closed his eyes, trying to hold back the tears. He shuddered as if remembering something. “It went on for so long...I lost track of it all…”

Sasuke felt a stab of guilt at his heart.  _ Why didn’t I notice sooner?! God, I’m such an idiot. I’m so sorry Naru.  _ “Shh, you’re here now. You’re safe.” He hesitated. “Why don’t you start with your dream?”

“Uh…” Naruto breathed in, trying to keep himself together. “I was...I was drowning. I could feel it was shallow water, but something no--someone, was holding me down. It was...it was a lot like...it was a lot like one time he nearly drowned me at school.” Naruto was shaking, closing his eyes, breathing rapidly again. 

Sasuke felt rage and guilt swamp him, but he held them back. He knew he needed to be there for Naruto. “Naruto? Naruto, look at me. Breathe. In and out. Slow. You’re here, you’re here with me. You’re safe now.” 

Naruto shook his head. “It was just...over and over again and I couldn’t do anything to stop it Sasuke.” he was almost holding his breath in between talking, as if he was afraid the air would suddenly disappear. “I’m so weak...pathetic...I couldn’t...do anything.” 

“Shh, no. No, you are not weak, no, you are not pathetic. No, you are not trash, no, you are not worthless. You’re kind and beautiful and amazing. You didn’t deserve this Naru, you didn’t.” Sasuke brushed the air out of his eyes. “Look at me. Breathe.” 

Naruto looked up at him, blue eyes met dark eyes. And he breathed, following Sasuke. “Thank you,” he said finally, softly, resting his head on Sasuke’s chest.

“Always Naruto, always.” Sasuke murmured, lightly kissing him on the top of the forehead. “I’m here. I’m here.” 

“I lost track of the number of times they…” Naruto shuddered, crying softly. “It was usually after band practice, on the way back home. That...that was why I started walking after practice. Then...then sometimes they would tell me to meet them somewhere. If I didn’t walk home or I didn’t show up...it was always worse.” 

Sasuke felt his heart breaking for what Naruto had gone through. So he pulled him closer. “I’m here Naru. You won’t ever have to go through that again, I promise.” 

Naruto sobbed, clinging to him. “Up to about...early November I guess I thought I could handle it. I thought I could...I mean I held out for like a month….but then it just got worse...and then Liam got to me during that one halftime...and then I just...broke.” The last word was barely a whisper. 

_ Early Nvember? No, a month before that. Why was I so blind?  _ Sasuke bit back his own anger and guilt, realizing what he meant. “Shh, baby, I’m here.” He cradled him in his arms as he cried, there didn’t seem to be much more to do. “Shh, it’s okay to cry. I’m here.” 

Realizing half an hour later he had fallen asleep Sasuke shifted his weight slightly, and pulled a blanket over both of them. He brushed the hair out of his eyes, holding Naruto close.  _ Rest easy, please. I’m here.  _


	28. Chapter 27: Fly Me To The Moon

Chapter 27: Fly Me To The Moon

Naruto was struggling with a roll of wrapping paper, a box, a roll of ribbon, tape and a bow. So far he had only managed to tape his fingers together twice, so he was actually quite happy with himself. 

He frowned at the box haphazardly covered with wrapping paper and tied with the ribbon. Then he smiled and stuck the bow on it. 

_ I think that’s the best I’ve ever wrapped anything for Christmas.  _ He sighed, smiling up at the ceiling.  _ And I think these past few months have been the happiest I’ve been in a long time.  _

Sasuke and Naruto had gone out to eat twice since then. But it seemed every day he was coming over or they were going for a walk in the park and just holding hands and just  _ being  _ there for each other. That was what they both needed. 

Naruto smiled, thinking about that first week. Sasuke had insisted on helping Naruto with all of his schoolwork and because of that, he’d gotten higher scores on his finals than ever before. 

And neither Liam or any of his group had made any move to bother him. Part of that was that Liam had ended up in juvenile detention, but Naruto didn’t want to think about that. 

Their apartment was filled with the smell of Iruka and Kakashi’s holiday cooking, they had a Christmas tree with a rainbow flag for a star, and Sasuke’s was coming over soon. That was what he wanted to be thinking about. 

Naruto walked into the small kitchen, already cramped with two people cooking in it, and grabbed one of the cookies. He loved these cookies, Iruka’s sugar cookies. Only at Christmas, but he loved them. 

Iruka caught his glance, and his expression softened. He patted Naruto reassuringly on the shoulder as he walked past, and it made Naruto’s heart hurt. But it was the hurt of a healing wound, of a mending bone. 

_ I’m glad I told him everything,  _ He thought, remember the conversation he had with his dad last evening. Iruka had suspected what he had told him, he hadn’t been mad, he just wanted to make sure Naruto was doing better now.  _ I am doing better,  _ He reminded himself,  _ no new scares. Never again.  _

The doorbell rang, lurching him out of his own thoughts. “I’ll get it!” He nearly shouted, swallowing the last bit of the cookie. 

He ran to the door, opening it and smiling to see Sasuke. 

And he was even happier, happier he didn’t flinch anymore when Sasuke moved to hug him. “Happy holidays Naru,” Sasuke pulled him close, and Naruto felt the familiar sense of comfort in the touch. 

“Hello Sasuke,” Iruka said, smiling as he came inside. “Make yourself at home.” 

Sasuke looked slightly uncomfortable, rubbing his neck. “Um...thanks for having me over for the night Iruka. I’m sorry I’m a bother I mean I didn’t mean to make you change plans or anything…” 

He trailed off as Iruka shook his head. “No Sasuke, it’s fine. Naruto and I usually do a bit of a Christmas dinner on Christmas eve anyways and then open presents in the morning, we’re happy to have you and Kakashi over for a while. Actually Kakashi and I are going out for a bit after we eat, so you guys will get the apartment to yourselves for a bit.” 

Naruto smiled. “It’s going to be great. Now come on, you have to try dad’s cookies, they’re actually almost better than ramen.” 

They were back in the living room now, sitting on the couch. Sasuke had an arm around his shoulders, and Naruto appreciated the small touch. It was comforting. 

“No hints at all?” Naruto was itching with curiosity. When he had seen Sasuke’s gift wrapping skills compared to his, he had to laugh. But now he was curious. 

Sasuke shook his head. “You wouldn’t give me any hints either! 

“Fine, I’ll wait then.” 

Kakashi and Iruka walked into the living room then, taking the small loveseat. The only reason they owned it was that it used to be Naruto’s bed when he was younger, but now that they actually had company over it was handy. 

“If anyone should get some hints on their gift, it’s us,” Kakashi complained, gesturing at the gift sitting on the coffee table. 

“Well, one gift on Christmas eve, that’s always been the tradition with me and my dad.” Naruto smiled, “Why don’t you guys open it?” 

“You sure Naruto?” Iruka hesitated. “It’s supposed to be your year.” 

Naruto shook his head.  _ Just having you guys here, just you being here with me, Sasuke, those are the best gifts I could ever have.  _ “No, really. Everyone in band wants to hear if you guys like it.”

“Okay…” Iruka said finally, picking up the package. 

Naruto smiled, hoping they would like it. The band had come together for it, everyone pitched in a bit. Maybe just a quarter or a dollar, but everyone had put something in. That was the entire point. 

Kakashi and Iruka were close to tears. 

It wasn’t really much. A framed photo of the band at state, signed by everyone, and two coffee mugs that said “World’s best band directors.” Perhaps a bit cheesy. 

“Everyone pitched in,” Naruto began, not sure what to say. “Um...you guys like it?” 

Kakashi nodded, smiling through his mask. “Thank you. Tell everyone we love it. 

Naruto smiled. That was perfect then. 

  
  
  
  


Naruto glanced above his head, suddenly remembering seeing Iruka hang the mistletoe there. Iruka had obviously been hoping to catch Kakashi under it, but now Naruto and Sasuke had unintentionally stepped under it. 

He glanced at Sasuke, feeling himself blush slightly.  _ That’s...not a bad thing though is it?  _

Sasuke smiled softly, lacing his fingers into Naruto’s. “Mistletoe.” 

Naruto nodded, smiling. “Yeah, mistletoe. “So...um..” He felt himself trailing over his own words as he got lost looking into Sasuke’s eyes. 

“Shut up and kiss me Naru.” 

Naruto felt Sasuke’s hand on his head, pulling in him in. And he didn’t resist, pulling Sasuke back close to him. Nothing had felt so right in longer than he could remember. 

_ I need you Sasuke,  _ He thought, pulling him deeper into the kiss and his embrace.  _ You’re the only reason I’m still living. You are my sun and stars and everything in between. I love you so much it hurts, but that pain is a good pain. That pain is the only thing binding me to this earth, to this life.  _

He closed his eyes, just wanting to for the moment be close to the person he loved. 

Sasuke stepped back a moment, both of them breathless with the moment. “I’m sorry Naru are you sure I mean--”

“I love you.” Naruto stopped him by resuming the kiss. 

They had been gentle before, almost hesitant. Both unsure, unsure how deep these feelings really ran between them. 

Now there could be no hesitation, they both  _ knew.  _ No ocean could have ever compared to the depth of the love between them in that moment, both clinging to each other to cling life itself. This was a passionate attempt to convey that depth of love. 

The world could have been hit by an asteroid, and in that moment Naruto realized he wouldn’t have even noticed.  _ Maybe it’s naive of us,  _ He thought, still holding Sasuke close as they both sought to express this unfathomable depth of love between them.  _ Maybe it’s naive of me. But I love you Sasuke.  _

He felt Sasuke running his fingers through his hair, almost as if he was telling Naruto without words,  _ “I love you too Naruto. Every bit of you.”  _

Naruto pulled him closer, a hand on his back. There was a part of him afraid, afraid to ever lose this. Afraid to ever lose him. And so that part of him drew him closer, wanting to be as close as physically possible. 

Sasuke and Naruto broke apart in the kiss, but continued to hold each other close, both too breathless to speak for a moment. Naruto felt Sasuke pulled him closer, tucking him under his chin, almost cradling him in his arms. 

And he realized he felt safe. Safe and warm and...loved. 

Sasuke kissed his forehead lightly. “I love you more than anything Naru. I will always love you.” 

They stood in silence for a minute, still holding each other desperately close. Naruto almost felt himself crying, except he was far too happy to cry. This kind of happy went far beyond the happy that brought tears. 

Truly, he felt happy. Truly, he felt safe. Truly, he felt loved. 

“I love you too Sasuke,” Naruto looked up into his eyes. “More than I could ever say with words. I love you with every broken part of my soul.” 

“Shh,” Sasuke held him closer, somehow. “You’re not broken Naru. You’re perfect, beautiful, amazing in every way possible. I love every bit of you, so much I can’t even fathom anything else at this point.” 

“Sasuke?” 

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.” 

Sasuke kissed his forehead again. “Always and forever Naru, always and forever.” 

Naruto found himself turning to the cd player next to them on the counter, blindly pressing play. It was one of Iruka’s CDs, but he didn’t really mind Frank Sinatra. Sasuke pulled him close again, as “Fly Me to the Moon” started playing. 

Naruto stepped back slightly, smiling. And he bowed, extending his hand. “May I have this dance?” 

Sasuke laughed a bit, smiling in return. “Yes Naru,” He said, his voice almost breaking.  Sasuke pulled him close again, softly swaying with the music. “Dance with me. Dance with me like the world doesn’t exist.” 

Outside, soft snowflakes were beginning to fall. Inside, people were with friends and family, sharing the magic of that Christmas eve with each other. 

And Naruto and Sasuke were oblivious to the rest of the world. Lost in each other’s eyes, they continued to cling to each other even as they danced, still clinging to life.

They found themselves in front of the Christmas tree in the living room as the song came closer to its end, their hands intertwined. Naruto kissed Sasuke briefly, gently. “I love you.” 

“I love you too.” 

Sasuke pulled him closer, resting his forehead on his. “Stay here with me.” 

“I’m not going anywhere.”

They found themselves on the couch, with a blanket wrapped around them. Naruto found himself running a hand through Sasuke’s hair, he never realized how soft it was until then. He rested his head against Sasuke shoulder, feeling safe. Their only want in the world at that point was to just...hold each other close, let each other know it was okay now. 

So that was exactly what they did. 

 

Iruka turned back to Kakashi as they entered the apartment, motioning for him to be quiet. 

“Ssh,” He gestured towards the couch. “Look.” 

Naruto and Sasuke were asleep in each othe’rs arms, a blanket wrapped around them. Both were sleeping peacefully, still holding on to each other. 

_ Oh Naruto, my little sunshine.  _ Iruka smiled.  _ I’m so happy for you.  _

Kakashi grinned, pulling Iruka closer too. “Honestly that is a little too cute not to take a picture, don’t you think?” He whispered. 

Iruka nodded, grinning in return and grabbing his phone to take a picture. That done he stopped for a moment, looking at his son sleeping so peacefully.  _ I’m so happy for you Naruto, and I’m so proud.  _

He turned, turning off the light, before turning back to Kakashi. He gave the other man a small, light kiss on the cheek. “I think it’s time we got some sleep as well Kakashi.” He glanced at the clock, it was already past midnight. 

Kakashi pulled him into a tight embrace, kissing his forehead. “Merry Christmas love.” 

 

And for once, both Naruto and Sasuke found themselves sleeping peacefully, without nightmares.

  
  


Afternote: This is absurdly long compared to my usual chapter length for fan fictions. But this chapter just turned a bit long than I expected. Also, perhaps the kiss was rushed. But it’s mistletoe. That’s like a law of physics right? 

So Merry Christmas in June, hope you’re enjoying reading. 


	29. Chapter 28: Christmas

Chapter 28: Christmas

Sasuke woke up happy and warm and most importantly, not alone. He’d been drifting in this sea of loneliness for so long the last few months had felt almost unreal. But in a good way. Too good to be true, but they were true and real and concrete and Naruto was there with him and that was all that mattered. 

Naruto was still asleep and that was nice, just to be near him for a while. Just to hold him close. 

He was so peaceful. 

_ I love you... _ Sasuke thought, smoothing Naruto’s hair gently. 

Sasuke smiled, thinking of his smile. His laugh. His sparkling eyes, like a clear, perfect sky. 

It’s perfect. He’s perfect. 

Everything was...perfect. 

“Morning Sasuke,” Naruto mumbles suddenly, almost startling Sasuke. And then there was a small kiss on his cheek and he just felt himself melt on the inside. 

“Morning Naru,” He said softly, pulling him closer again. “Merry Christmas.” 

“Merry Christmas…” And then Naruto smiled, as if remembering something and moved to sit up. 

“Do we really have to get up?” Sasuke was surprised at himself, he was usually an early riser. 

“Shh, I’m just going to grab presents.” 

Sasuke smiled as he sat up and Naruto handed him the box and then wrapped them in a blanket. 

The gift looks like someone tried to wrap it blind but Sasuke couldn’t have loved it more. 

And when he saw the card he couldn’t help but laugh. Naruto’s love for puns was something he had grown to find quiet endearing. 

The gift almost makes him cry. A small plastic tree, small enough it wouldn’t take up too much room. He remembered telling Naruto that, that he hadn’t bothered to put up a Christmas tree in years. 

“Everyone deserves some Christmas cheer,” Naruto said softly with a smile and Sasuke pulled him close again, trying not to cry. 

“Open your’s,” Sasuke said finally, handing him the box. 

Naruto took the box, smiling, and tore off the paper. Inside he picks up the two items, a framed picture of them at the park and a small leather bracelet. “I love it,” He said finally, also trying not to cry, and Sasuke was so happy to hear that. 

Sasuke smiled, picking up the bracelet and tying it around Naruto’s wrist, covering it back up with his long sleeves. He kissed Naruto gently on the side of his forehead, holding him close. “So you remember I’m always with you Naru.” 

He was actually a bit surprised when he thought of the gift. But now he was sure it was perfect and he was starting to feel ridiculously happy again. 

Kakashi and Iruka stumble in a couple minutes later, both barely half-awake. “Morning,” Iruka said finally, looking at them. “Want to help me make pancakes?” 

“Can you make them?” Naruto turned to face his dad, speaking honestly. “I always burn things, you know…” 

Iruka smiled, nodding. It seemed to Sasuke this was the answer Iruka was expecting. “Of course Naruto, pancakes coming right up.” 

Kakashi followed Iruka into the kitchen then, leaving them alone again. 

Naruto turned back to Sasuke, leaning his head against his shoulder. “Sasuke?” 

“Yeah Naru?” 

“I love you.” 

Such simple words. 

“I love you too Naru.” 

Such simple words that mean the world to both of them. 

The morning went perfect, a blissful time of just eating pancakes and laughing and everything is perfect. Kakashi suggested finally they go drive up to the park, talk a walk like they usually do. It sounded like an amazing idea to Sasuke, and Naruto agreed. 

So to the park they went, bundled up warmly, to go for a nice walk. 

-0-

Some moments in life are so happy, so perfect, you wish they would never end. You wish you could stay that way forever. But you know you can’t, you can’t stop the inevitable flow of time. You are as powerless as a leaf drifting down a stream, and all you can hope to do is to appreciate the moments, appreciate the people that make them special, before they’re gone forever. Because all things end. 

Naruto turned to Sasuke as they drove back from the park, laughing and smiling. Really, honestly happy. Outside the sky had just begun to turn orange and gold, as if the heavens were aflame. It was beautiful. 

“Why can’t every day be as perfect as this?” Naruto said with a sigh, leaning back again the chair. 

Sasuke smiled, still focusing on driving. “I don’t know Naru, maybe they can be. I don’t see why not.” 

Naruto smiled, wishing that could be true.  _ That would be nice,  _ he thought, looking back at Sasuke. He was always struck by Sasuke’s eyes, dark, but beautiful too. “I’d like that.” He said finally, barely a whisper. 

And then everything happened at once. 

He saw the truck, speeding towards them, and knew they’d never make it out of the way in time. The black truck was sliding across the ice of the road, but it didn’t seem like the driver had much control to begin with, probably drunk. 

Not just any white truck. Liam’s white truck. 

Every fiber of Naruto’s being revolted in fear.  _ No. No. No! Why now? Why now?! This isn’t supposed to happen. Not...not now.  _

And then the truck slammed into them. There was the sound of an explosion and something burning and someone was screaming, he wasn’t sure who, maybe he was screaming. 

He came to lying in the snow, it was shockingly cold. His mind running all different directions he managed to get an arm under himself, pulling up to his knees and blinking to look around. There was a god-awful head splinting ringing in his ears. 

And then he saw Sasuke, lying in the snow. Blood on the snow, staining it red. 

He was dragging himself to Sasuke on sheer willpower, pulling him into his arms. 

“No…” It was barely a whisper, a silent plea, a powerless pray. Naruto’s body was shaking with tears and shock and after everything that had happened, he just couldn’t process what was in front of him. 

Sasuke looked up at him weakly, he’d been hit worse, Naruto could tell. 

Neither of them were good, but to Naruto, it seemed Sasuke was... _ No...No. No. I can’t even think of that. No. I refuse to accept that could be true. No.  _

“Naru..” His voice was weak. 

“No…” Naruto’s voice broke, tears falling from his eyes. “Sasuke…” 

“Look at me Naru...look at me.” Sasuke smiled, faintly. “You’re eyes are so pretty Naru. So bright.” 

“Shh, no…” Naruto held him closer, ignoring his own protesting body. “Don’t...don’t talk. Damn it. Damn it all! Why can’t things just go right for once? Why can’t we just be...happy…?” 

Sasuke’s eyes drooped closed, almost peacefully. “You’re here with me. I’m happy.” 

And then he was quiet. Too quiet. 

Naruto was screaming, but he couldn’t hear his own voice. The sounds of the burning wreckage seemed distant, like they didn’t exist. He didn’t even see Charlotte and Finn climbing out of the back of the truck, didn’t even care. When the ambulance arrived, he started to feel himself drifting again. 

Drifting back into the black, away from the happiness that had been. Happy? Happy was a distant memory. He was falling into the black, drowning in an ocean of tears.

With the setting of the sun, all light seemed to have left the world. 


	30. Chapter 29: Wake Up

Chapter 29: Wake up

It was the pungent smell of disinfectant that hit him first. The smell of a hospital. 

Then the sounds. His heart pounding in his ears, a small beep boop noise, indicating he was still alive. His own heavy breathing. Other than that it was almost painfully quiet. 

Naruto slowly opened his eyes, blinking to bring the blinding light into focus.  _ A hospital. How long have I been here? Why am I here? What...what happened?  _

His chest felt heavier as the memories hit him, and fear coursed through his veins like ice. 

The truck. Liam’s truck. The crash. The explosion. Pain and blood. Sasuke. 

_ Sasuke… _

“Sasuke…!” His voice came out a raspy whisper, and he couldn’t remember ever feeling so thirsty. But that didn’t matter, thirst, his aching body, none of it mattered because he had to know what had happened, where was Sasuke. If he was…

_ No! I refuse to believe that...no…He can’t really be...gone? Can he? _

Something in Naruto’s heart ached with a horrible dread. 

“No…please...no…” It was a silent, hopeless prayer, helpless against the river of time and the forces of fate. Naruto hated how pathetic it sounded. 

_ This...this is all my fault, isn’t it? I’m a curse on this world...I shouldn’t even be alive...Sasuke...no...I need you, you can’t be..gone... _

He couldn’t even cry. Tears were threatening his eyes but he was so filled with a silent deep dread he couldn’t even cry. 

And then Iruka was there beside the bed, and his voice was comforting but it seemed really far off, too far off. The whole world seemed like that, distant and strange. 

“Naruto!” He snapped back, finally focusing on the person in front of him. “Look at me Sunshine, look, please, focus.” 

_ Sunshine...dad only uses that when he’s worried or upset...dad…no...Please! He can’t be gone...  _ “Dad…?” 

Iruka nearly collapsed back into the chair by Naruto’s bed, holding on tight to his hand. Naruto focused on that, using that simple touch to help ground himself, remind himself that he is there. 

“I’m here Naruto,” He said finally, softly. “Here, take some water.” 

“Sasuke? What happened?” 

“Drink some water,” Iruka demanded, giving him the straw. 

Naruto took it, grateful. But it didn’t stop the sea of worry and unease around his mind. He didn’t want to believe his fears could have any real weight to them but there was something deep in him worried that there really was something wrong. 

Because he remembered Sasuke’s blood on the snow much too vividly. He remembered the horrible sounds and the heat of the explosion. 

“Sasuke…” He repeated, insistent. 

“He’s fine Naruto, he’ll wake up soon. It’s nothing short of a miracle, but both of you are alive and not too badly hurt. A couple concussions, new bruises, burns, and a couple broken bones for Sasuke, but you’re both going to be alright.” 

Relief washed over him like he’d been hit with an ocean.

The relief hit him harder than the fear, and suddenly he couldn’t hold back the tears threatening to escape hmm. “I was so afraid dad,” He finally choked out, trying to stop the tears. “I was afraid I was losing him. I...I couldn’t...survive losing him.” 

“Shh, kiddo, he’s fine. I promise.” 

“What...what happened?” 

Iruka sighed, rubbing his temples. “Liam somehow got out of juvy and crashed his truck into you guys. He was drunk, they’re fairly certain it wasn’t intentional. Just really bad luck. Someone had rigged his car with explosives--the car crash triggered them. It might have a gang, Akatsuki I think they were saying? No one has any idea why.” 

Naruto was silent for a moment, trying to process the information. And then finally, he spoke. “Liam...Liam’s...dead, isn’t he?” 

Iruka nodded, slowly. “Some other high schoolers were in the truck with him, they survived. But Liam is dead.” 

Naruto stared up at the ceiling for a moment. “I’m not even sure how to react to that.” 

“Try not to think about it, you need rest. That’s what the doctors said, rest.” 

“I don’t want to rest,” Naruto said, almost immediately.  _ I’ll process everything later.  _ “I want to see Sasuke.” 

“Ah, I don’t know if that’s a good idea the doctors said rest and I should really let them know you woke up--”

Iruka was cut off as the door opened and a doctor, Naruto felt like he recognized her, walked in. “Look who woke up,” She said with a smile. “And I’m sure you’re anxious to see your fellow patient. Just let me do my checkup and then you can go over there for a bit. He hasn’t woken up yet, but he should soon.” 

Naruto couldn’t help but smile, remember her name suddenly. “Thank you, Doctor Tsunade.”

She smiled in return. 

Naruto hesitated at the door, suddenly unsure if he could handle this. They had told him Sasuke was a little worse than he was, and he wasn’t exactly good. He had bandages all over for the burns and his head felt like it was splitting in two. 

But he wanted to see Sasuke. He needed to see Sasuke, to be able to hold him close and not let go. 

So he opened the door. 

And there he was, in a room just like Naruto’s. Lying on a hospital bed next to a beeping heart monitor. 

Everything felt unreal as Kakashi pulled up a chair next to the hospital bed for him. Naruto barely registered it as the others leave the room to give him a minute of privacy. 

He was worse. More bandages and Tsunade said he had several broken bones. Fractures, a rib and wrist. 

But none of that really mattered because Naruto was holding Sasuke’s uninjured hand in his and they were both alive and that was the only thing that mattered. 

He was crying, sobbing. He didn’t care. 

“Na..ru..” The voice was thin and raspy, pained. “Shh, no tears.” 

Naruto felt the hand reaching up, brushing away his tears. He looked up, meeting Sasuke’s eyes.  Sasuke was looking at him, somehow smiling, ever so faintly. “You’re okay…”

“Yeah, Naru, look at me. I’m okay. We’re okay. Hey, look at me. Breathe. In...and out.” 

Naruto breathed with him, in and out, slowly calming down. “Don’t ever scare me like that again Sasuke,” Naruto finally looked up, meeting his eyes again. “I...I thought you were...gone. I can’t lose you. After everything else, I can’t lose you.” 

“Shh,” Sasuke held up his good hand, grabbing onto Naruto and pulling him closer. “Come here.” 

Naruto laid down next to him, mindful of both of their injuries. “I can’t lose you…” 

“You’re not going to lose me,” Sasuke said softly. “I’m right here. Don’t focus on anything else. Right here, right now. Nothing else. Breathe.” 

Naruto fell asleep again with Sasuke, no one had the heart to move them. He fell asleep clinging to Sasuke as if he might disappear and he doesn’t quite realize it but Sasuke was clinging just as strongly to Naruto. As if they were drowning and that was the only thing that was going to keep their heads above water was each other. 


	31. Chapter 30: First Day Back

Chapter 30: First day back

Naruto walked up to the school building that morning, and he couldn’t help but smile a bit. It was a little bit forced, but this was different. He was forcing himself to smile for his own sake. 

_ This should make me happy...I’m finally coming back to school...Sasuke and I are both fine...everything should be fine.  _ He leaned against the wall with a sigh, staring up at the sky.  _ But it’s not. It’s not…”fine.”  _

He hadn’t gotten much sleep last night. He kept waking up from the nightmares. And these were worse, so much worse. Naruto had finally started to come to terms with everything that happened with Liam. But now he couldn’t shake the fear that Sasuke was dying. 

The blood on the snow, his blood on the snow. Naruto couldn’t get that image out of his head, and it terrified him. 

It was haunting him, and no matter how many times he tried to rationalize what happened, he couldn’t. Nor could he help the guilt that seemed to surround him day and day out. 

_ We got lucky this time, we’re both okay,  _ He tried to remind himself.  _ But what about next time? Our lives are hanging by strings that could break or be cut at any moment, we wouldn’t be able to stop it.  _

Naruto shook his head, trying not to think about it. He needed to be able to focus today, both he and Sasuke had taken the first week of school off to help give their injuries some time to heal. 

“Naruto? Hey, Naruto!” Naruto turned at the sound of the voice, surprised. It was Kiba. 

_ Friends. I have...friends.  _ He remembered, and then he really did smile. “Hey Kiba!” 

“You alright man?” Kiba smiled, clapping him on the shoulder. Naruto tried to not wince with pain, it really was just a friendly gesture. “When we came by the hospital to visit you both looked really badly hurt, I mean you look a bit better now, but you sure you’re ready to be back at school?” 

Naruto thought about it, remembering how stir-crazy Sasuke and he had gone the past two weeks. “Yeah, I’m glad to be back.” 

Kankuro walked up behind them, pulling Kiba into a half hug. It made Naruto happier, to see his friends happy. “Glad to hear that Naruto, we’re happy you’re back.” 

Kiba smiled, waving. “Well, we’ll see you in class then.”

Naruto smiled, turning back to head in the direction of his first class, and then he heard the footsteps running up behind him. “Naru! Hey, sorry I’m late.” 

He loved Sasuke’s hugs. To know that he was there, that they were okay, that was all that mattered. 

“Hey Sasuke,” He said, softly. “How are you feeling?” 

“To be honest not the best,” Sasuke laughed slightly. “But hey, we’re back. Come on, today’s going to be great.” 

“Okay.” 

It turned out not to be too bad, they had gotten most of the homework brought to them at home, so the catch-up work wasn’t too extensive. The classes without Sasuke were the worst, but they met up in every passing period, and he had friends now. He even liked the book they were reading for English, “The Princess Bride.” 

_ Maybe things aren’t really that bad,  _ Naruto smiled as he walked to lunch, looking over at Sasuke walking beside him.  _ We’re...we’re okay.  _

And with that sudden realization, it really sunk in, and Naruto felt weak in his knees. 

Sasuke noticed immediately, moving to the side and pulling him into a hug. “Naru? What’s wrong? You’re shaking.” 

“I’m sorry,” He managed to gasp out, trying not to cry. “I was just so...afraid I was going to lose you Sasuke.” 

“Shh, Naru. Look at me. I’m right here, we’re okay.” 

Naruto was glad he somehow was able to believe Sasuke’s words. “Thank you.” 

He smiled, kissing Naruto lightly on the forehead. “Don’t have to thank me Naru. Alright, come on. All our friends are probably waiting for us at lunch.”

Naruto nodded, following.  _ Things are going to be okay. So many bad things have happened...but so many good things have happened. Things are going to be okay from here on out, I have to believe that.  _

 

Naruto ran to catch up with Sasuke, smiling. They were both definitely excited for last period, band. 

They stepped into the band hall and were soon surrounded by the familiar chaos of band. People were warming up and scrambling to put together instruments and find music and someone was playing around on the drumset and everything about it was...perfect. 

“Naruto and Sasuke are back!” Suddenly someone shouted, and somehow it was heard over the noise. 

And then someone was clapping. More people joined them, standing up. People were clapping, and cheering. 

Sasuke pulled him into a hug, and the cheering just got louder. 

“I love you Naru.” It was a quiet whisper, only Naruto heard it over the noise. 

“I love you too Sasuke.” 

 

Sasuke walked home with him, and Naruto was always grateful for that. With Sasuke around, his anxiety almost completely seemed to go away. 

“So, what subject are you having the most difficulty with?” Sasuke asked as they walked inside. Naruto hadn’t even had to ask for help with his homework, Sasuke had offered. 

“Probably math,” Naruto laughed a bit. “I’m horrible with math.” 

“You’ve gotten a lot better,” Sasuke smiled as they sat down on the couch, taking out their books. 

Naruto grinned. “Thanks.”

Sasuke helped him for a bit and then they say in a companionable silence, working independently, Sasuke helping when Naruto had questions. Naruto had put on some music, and he loved the smile Sasuke gave him as “Fly Me To The Moon” came on. 

That was when Naruto realized Sasuke had fallen asleep, leaning against his shoulder. 

_ You’re too cute Sasuke,  _ Naruto smiled, brushing hair out of Sasuke’s eyes.  _ Too amazing. How do I deserve your love” Well...I’m grateful. Eternally grateful.  _ He kissed him lightly on the forehead. “I love you Sasuke.” It was quiet, barely a whisper. 

“Love you too Naru,” Sasuke said, almost quieter, pulling him closer. 

Naruto relaxed, let himself believe. Let himself believe he really could be happy again. 


	32. Chapter 31: Not Going Anywhere

Chapter 31: Not Going Anywhere

 

Naruto looked up at the clear sky, appreciating the cold bite in the air. Some parts of winter he didn’t like, but there was an odd magic to it. 

And he was happy. Happy he had the ability to walk to band practice, without shaking in terror. Happy he could fully appreciate the moment, and not take this walk in terror. 

So he smiled, looking up at the few clouds in the sky and appreciating the snow crunching beneath his shoes. The day couldn’t have been more perfect.  _ Actually...no.  _ Naruto’s smile broadened.  _ The day will be even more perfect when I get to band, because you’ll be there Sasuke.  _

And then the world shattered, like glass. The tentative barrier between him as his fears over the last few months had been a fragile thing to begin with, and it shattered. 

“You got a lot to pay up for trash.” Naruto froze, dread sinking into every fiber of his being. 

He swallowed, trying not to fall apart. “Finn. Leave me alone. I’m done letting you use me as a punching bag. I’m...not afraid of you anymore.” But he was shaking, and his voice was trembling with fear. 

Finn straight up laughed, mocking him with every bit of who he was. “You never were a good liar Naruto.” 

Not just Finn either, Charlotte, Isaac and a few others as well. He was outnumbered, surrounded, no escaping.  

_ No! Not again! No! I can’t let this happen...but I can’t even move.  _ Naruto was shaking, trying not to fall to his knees.  _ This isn’t fair...I don’t want this to happen...again...I can’t take this.  Now _

“You got anything to say for everything you’ve done trash?” Charlotte’s words bit like a knife, further shattering all the strength he had built up over the last few months. “Anything?!” She demanded. 

Some detached part of his brain realized Charlotte was crying. 

Naruto stumbled back. “I...I didn’t mean to…” He caught over his words, unable to properly speak anymore. 

The past few months, he built up this illusion. This illusion that he wasn’t weak, he wasn’t pathetic, this illusion that he mattered. And now they were throwing that shattered illusion back in his face for what it really was. 

He felt the air get knocked out of him. He felt himself fall. He felt the kicks. He felt the punches. 

All of them, every blow, shattering the tentative hold he had made on who he was. 

“Listen here you trash.” Naruto felt himself get pulled to his knees, and through a blurry field of vision he saw Finn’s face. “You know how this is. You remember, right?! You’re trash, nothing. You deserve this.” 

He saw the light reflect off it as Finn hold up something by a cloth, a piece of broken glass. And he felt terror grip him as the world continued to shatter around him. 

He tried to scream. But someone was choking him from behind, he couldn’t even really struggle. 

And it was that same old nightmare. The world was shattering into a nightmare. And that same thought was back in Naruto’s mind.  _ I deserve this anyways... _

 

Sasuke glanced at the clock again, getting increasingly worried. They were supposed to meet before practice twelve minutes ago, the whole band. Naruto still hadn’t shown. He’d never been this late ever before, always on time, and he wasn’t answering his phone. 

Someone walked in the door. It wasn’t Naruto. The clock struck the next minute. And Sasuke decided he was going to look for him. 

He just couldn’t take the chance that something was wrong. 

“Shikamaru,” Sasuke said, turning to his friend. “We’ve got to check on Naruto. Grab some others, I don’t want to run the risk of being outnumbered.” 

He frowned. “You think?” 

Sasuke grimaced, standing up. “He’s never late Shikamaru. Never.” 

 

Naruto was trying to scream still. But he couldn’t scream. The world was going dark around him and there was a line of pain down his arm but it all seemed so far away and he still couldn’t scream. Even the cold, the freezing, biting cold, seemed a distant thing.

They were saying something, shouting something. But it was too far away to hear. 

He sagged, part of him defeated. He was broken, shattered to the core. No strength left to try to fight it. 

“Get your hands off him!” That voice...that voice stuck out though. Who was that? Someone important. 

_ Sasuke…  _ Naruto thought weakly. 

“Naruto I’m coming!” 

The world was reeling around him in flashes. Suddenly the immense pressure was gone, and he was gasping for air, tearing of the dark sack over his face. He coughed, almost choking on his own breath. The snow around him was suddenly startling cold, in just a t-shirt he was freezing. 

People were shouting. It all seemed so far away though. There was nothing but trying to breathe and the sudden shock realization he was freezing. And the line of pain running down his arm. 

He looked down at his arm finally, staring in shock at the blindingly bright world around him. And he screamed. 

The blood was dripping onto the snow down, a line of red cutting past old scars. Scars he never wanted to think about again. 

And he screamed again because the world was still crumbling around him again, everything was still shattering. 

He threw up, barely felt it. 

Then there was that voice again, Sasuke’s voice. “Naruto! Naruto say something! Look at me, please!”

He looked up, still gasping for breath. He could feel the panic surrounding him, like a noose. “Sasuke?” He said finally, weakly. 

Sasuke was pulling him into his arms, but even that seemed so far off. Another world almost. He was tying someone shirt or jacket around his arm as a bandage, but even that seemed far away. Sasuke was cursing under his breath as he tried to tie it with one hand, but then someone else was helping him.

He tried to close his eyes, maybe if he couldn’t see it the world would stop shattering. But that only brought back the memories of the dark bag over his head, of not being able to even breathe. 

“Naruto!” He snapped back, looking up blurry into Sasuke’s eyes. “Stay with me, don’t pass out now, please. Just...just try to focus on me okay?” Sasuke was pulling another jacket around Naruto’s, and then his big outer coat too. 

“Sasuke?” Naruto was still shaking, couldn’t stop himself. He wasn’t just shaking with the fear, he was shivering with the cold still. Tears were streaming down his face. 

“I’m here.” Sasuke’s voice broke. “I’m here.” He pulled him close, cradling him. “I’m so sorry Naruto I should have been here sooner.” 

Naruto buried his head in Sasuke’s shoulder, still crying. “But you came.” 

The world around them was a blur. Sasuke seemed to have brought a decent amount of the band with him, Finn and Charlotte were running for all they could. 

But all that was distant. He world had shrunk again, to Sasuke holding him. He didn’t have the strength to face more than that. 

“Naruto, Naru look at me,” Sasuke’s voice was pleading. “Look up at the sky Naru, isn’t it beautiful? Just focus, focus on that. I’m here.” 

“Get me away from here Sasuke,” Naruto was sobbing into his shirt, trying to ignore the world around them. “Please…” 

“Shh, we’ll get out of here soon Naru, it’s going to be okay no, I promise. Shh, I’m here.” 

“Naruto?!” Then there was another voice picking out between the people around him. “Sunshine?!” 

_ Dad…  _ He thought weakly.  _ I’m sorry. I promised you I’d never be late to practice here.  _

There was another hand on his shoulder then, and then Iruka and Sasuke were both holding him close, also trying to warm him from the cold. “Just focus on us Naruto. We’ve got you now.” 

“Can you stay with him Sasuke? I want to call the police.” Iruka took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. “He needs you.” 

Sasuke nodded, holding him closer. “Always.” 

They said a couple other things, but Naruto didn’t even really hear them. “Sasuke?” He said finally, looking up at him. “What did I do deserve this?” 

Sasuke pulled him closer, cradling his head in his arm. “You didn’t deserve this Naruto. Never think for a moment that you did.” 

Then the police were there. They wanted Naruto to let the medic take care of his arm. 

And suddenly he felt like he was going to be sick again. “No…” He said, barely speaking, clinging to Sasuke. “No! Please don’t…” 

The medic was saying something to Sasuke. And then Sasuke looked at him for a second, and shook his head. “He...he’s really uncomfortable with taking off his shirt.” He said finally, uncertain. 

“Please don’t let them take me away Sasuke.” Sasuke was the only thing in the world that hadn’t shattered. And Naruto was depending on that to keep himself together. He needed him. 

The medic frowned at Sasuke. “Sir I need to do my job.” 

And Sasuke shook his head. “It’s not a terribly deep cut, and I managed a makeshift bandage earlier. Won’t need stitches either. I can finish properly bandaging it at my house.” 

The man frowned again. “He’s been through a lot just now, don’t you think it would be better if he had the help of professionals? An incident like this can be traumatic for a person. You don’t understand--”

“No, you don’t understand.” Sasuke cut him off. “Talk to Iruka, his guardian. Please, leave Naruto for the moment. Talk to Iruka first, please.”  

Naruto pulled himself closer to Sasuke, trying to shut out the outside world. 

“Can we leave? Now? Please…?” He hated how pathetic he sounded, but he need to get out of that place. He needed to get away from everyone. 

“Home?” 

Naruto shook his head. “Not my home, please. I need to get away from everything.” 

“Okay, we can go to my apartment. Just breathe, it’s going to be okay now. I promise.”

“I’m sorry…” Naruto hated that he couldn’t stop himself from crying.

“Shh no, you don’t have to be sorry Naru.” Sasuke pulled him closer, and for that he was grateful. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.” 


	33. Chapter 32: We're Okay

Chapter 32: We’re Okay

Sasuke pulled his jacket closer around Naruto, holding him close with one arm as he opened the door to his apartment with the other. He was still shaking, clutching to Sasuke like his life depended on it. 

And it broke his heart to see his little ball of sunshine broken like that. 

“Shh,” Sasuke led him inside, turning on the lights and turning back to face him. He was glad the heat was on, it was warm inside. Naruto was looking down, trying not to cry. “Hey,” He held a hand on Naruto's chin, getting him to look up just a bit. Their eyes met, and tears started to fall down Naruto’s. Sasuke pulled him close, cradling him in his arms. “It’s okay Naru. I’ve got you. Cry if you need to. I’m here.” 

Naruto shook with tears, clinging to Sasuke. “I just...don’t...understand. Why? Why...me? What did I do?” 

“No. No Naru. This wasn’t your fault. Nothing about this was ever your fault.” Sasuke pulled back  a little bit. “Hey, look at me. Look at me. What has happened to you was wrong, all of it. You didn’t deserve to be hurt like this. And I swear on my life, I will never let it happen again.” 

Naruto shook his head weakly, shaking again and stepping back a bit. “No..I’m...I’m trash just like they said...I...” 

“Naruto look at me god dammit!” Sasuke didn’t mean to shout so loudly, but at least Naruto looked him in the eyes again. “That isn’t true. Don’t ever say that. I…” Sasuke pulled him back into his arms. “I love you Naru. Your wonderful. Your amazing. Your beautiful and kind and I love you.” 

He stopped shaking a bit, relaxing in Sasuke’s arms. “I’m sorry, I--”

“You have nothing to apologize for Naruto,” Sasuke said, leading him in his arms back to his bedroom. “Sit,” He demanded, sitting down next to him on the bed. 

They sat in silence for a minute, Sasuke holding Naruto close. He wanted to ask if he was okay, but he knew he wasn’t.  _ I’m so sorry I didn’t get there sooner Naru.  _

“Thank you.” Naruto said finally, barely more than a whisper. “I don’t...I don’t know where I’d be right now if you weren’t here.” 

Sasuke touched his forehead to Naruto’s, needing him to know that he was there anyway he could. “I’m here Naruto.” He took a deep breath. “Naruto, I’m going to go for a minute. I want...I want to go get the first aid kit okay? I’ll be right back.” 

Naruto swallowed. “O...okay.” 

The sound of small feet came at the door as it creeped open. Sasuke saw Aoda, and as the cat jumped into his lap, he moved him to Naruto’s. Aoda had no problem, seeing as Naruto started petting the cat. “I’m not leaving you, I’ll be right back okay?”

Naruto nodded, and Sasuke hurried to get the first aid kid out of the bathroom. The bruises he couldn’t do much about except ice them in a bit, but he wanted to do something about the cut on Naruto’s arm. It was relatively shallow, but an infection wouldn’t be good. It needed to be cleaned and bandaged. 

Coming back to the room he saw Naruto holding Aoda to his chest, the cat all the way purring loudly enough Sasuke could hear it from the door. He sat down next to Naruto, holding him close for a moment. Finally he spoke. “Naruto…I want to treat your arm. Okay?” 

Naruto nodded, taking of Sasuke’s jacket first. Then there was Naruto’s jacket. And then Sasuke found himself cleaning the shallow cut up Naruto’s arm, his hands shaking a bit. He wrapped it with gauze finally, tying it off. And then he pulled Naruto back into his arms. “I’m so sorry.” 

Naruto shook his head a little, resting his head against Sasuke’s chest. “No...you have nothing...nothing to apologize for.” 

“I should have been there. I should have made it there sooner.” Now Sasuke was trying not to cry too. 

“But you came. You were there.” Their eyes met. “That’s all that matters.” 

“We’re here for you,” Sasuke said, wrapping the blanket on the bed around them. “The whole band--we’ll always be here for you. I’m here for you. Always. Just know that I love you. I love you with all my heart.”  

Sasuke cradled him in his arms, wishing so much he could do more. Finally he got Naruto to lay down, tucking the pillow under his head and holding him close. 

“Sasuke…” Naruto was still crying, still shaking. “I’m scared.” 

Sasuke pulled him even close. “It’s okay Naru. Just rest. Don’t worry about anything else right now. I’m here. You’ll be alright.” 

They laid in silence for some time, Sasuke holding Naruto close as he tried to calm down. Eventually Aoda curled up next to Naruto, purring loudly. 

“I’m sorry,” Naruto’s voice was so quiet he could barely hear it. 

“Shh, no,” Sasuke brushed the hair out of his eyes. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” Sasuke tried to smile, he was trying to be strong for him.  

The guilt was tearing him apart. 

_ This is all my fault, god, I’m such an idiot. I should have been there sooner. I should have been there sooner.  _

And then Naruto smiled, somehow. “Hey, Sasuke. Look, we’re okay. We’re...we’re going to be okay.” 

Sasuke pulled him closer, trying not to cry. There were enough tears for one day. “Yeah, we’re going to be okay.” 

“I love you.” 

Sasuke kissed the top of his forehead, wishing he could do so much more. “I love you too Naru.” 

“We can do this Sasuke, we’re going to be okay.” Naruto seemed almost desperate as he said it, and Sasuke understood. 

_ Maybe if we say it again and again, we can start to believe it again.  _ So he nodded, meeting Naruto’s eyes. “We’re going to be okay Naruto.” 

“Okay…” Naruto smiled again, trying to work past everything. “Do you have any food? I’m starving.” 

Sasuke smiled. “How about ramen?”


	34. Chapter 33: Beautiful

Chapter 33: Beautiful

Naruto almost dropped his tray at lunch. Strangely, this was making him more nervous than the test he just took. 

Keira laughed as she saw him. “Hey, don’t worry about it. You know he’ll say yes, why are you worried?” 

“...I guess you’re right.” 

Sasuke even seemed to notice he was nervous. 

After lunch, as they were walking to their next classes, Naruto turned to Sasuke, determined. 

“So um...Sasuke.” He managed to say, biting back his nervousness. “Um...card.” He mumbled, grabbing out the handwritten card out of his backpack and handing it to Sasuke. 

Sasuke stared in confusion, and then took the card. He smiled as he read it, which made Naruto hopeful at least. “I’m sorry,” Sasuke said with a small sigh. Naruto felt his heart sink. “I wanted to ask you first dobe. So my answer,” Sasuke pulled him into a hug. “Is definitely a yes.” 

“Oh,” Naruto managed to say finally, feeling giddy, his legs weak. 

 

Naruto smiled at Sasuke, not sure if he had ever been this happy in his life. 

The darkness seemed to be months behind them now. And Naruto was finding he was able to believe in life, able to believe they really were okay, more than okay. 

They both still had their bad days. Nightmares still came. Scars were still fading. 

But Naruto was happy. 

Sasuke was straightening his tie in the mirror, frowning at his reflection. 

Naruto laughed, hugging him, just to be close. “See? I told you the rainbow tie and bow tie was a  good idea.” 

“Well you’re right on that,” Sasuke smiled, turning back to Naruto. “But your bow tie is all crooked.” 

Naruto couldn’t help but continue to laugh as Sasuke straightened it. “Is that really a bad thing?” He asked, unstraightening Sasuke’s tie. “I liked it better like that.” 

“What do you mean? It looks far more presentable like this,” Sasuke frowned. 

He was almost giggling. “Sasuke,” He said quietly, purposely unstraightening his bow tie. “We are most certainly not straight people. Nothing about us is straight. So why would your tie be straight?” 

Sasuke rolled his eyes but smiled. “You and your puns.” He kissed his forehead, pulling him into a hug. “Still love you though.” 

“Love you too Sasuke,” Naruto smiled, glancing at the clock. “We better get going though, you said you wanted to make sure we were early.” 

 

They arrived at the venue for Prom half an hour early and met up with Keira and Kotone. Naruto waved, happy to see them. “Hey, guys!” They waved back, walking over. “Thank you again.”

Keira smiled. “Oh, no really Naruto, you don’t have to thank us. It’s no trouble.” 

It worked out great actually. Naruto and Sasuke were both sophomores, normally they wouldn’t have been able to go to prom. Keira and Kotone were both juniors though, and they had generously offered to sign them in. 

So it all worked out perfectly. 

Naruto smiled at Sasuke, happy. He was happy he had suggested the ties, the touch of rainbow was nice. Even Sasuke had liked it when Naruto suggested them. 

“You’re amazing, you know that right?” Naruto turned in surprise, he hadn’t expected Sasuke’s compliment. 

It warmed his heart though, because he could finally listen to those compliments, and believe them. The love between them had shown him the light in the world again and had taught him how to believe in himself again. 

“Thanks,” He smiled, pulling Sasuke into a half hug. “You’re amazing too. Let’s go get some food.”

They went and found a table with a few of their friends, setting down their food. Naruto laughed at how many tomatoes Sasuke had gotten, but he actually found it cute. 

The hour wore on, the music had started but neither of them had made any move to go dance. 

Sasuke smiled as if he had just had an idea. “I’ll be right back.” 

Naruto frowned, puzzled, but nodded as Sasuke walked off towards the dance floor. A little later Sasuke came back smiling, as if nothing had happened, and just shook his head when Naruto asked. 

“Just wait,” He said smiling, taking a sip of water. 

Naruto was puzzled but kept quiet about it. 

And then it hit him. Drifting from the speakers was coming a familiar song, “Fly Me To the Moon.” 

He grinned as Sasuke turned to him, smiling. “You requested that song….our song.” 

Sasuke nodded, clearly quite pleased with himself. He stood up and then bowed, holding out his hand. “May have this dance?” 

Naruto laughed, taking his hand. “Of course.” 

The dance was perfect. A lot of people took a break for that song, which was perfect because there was more room anyways. 

It was different than last time they danced to this song. A lot had happened even in those few months. 

But still, they danced as if the entire world wasn’t there. They were still holding on to each other for dear life, but now they were starting to finally believe. There were believing in themselves, believing in each other. And together, they believed they could do anything. 

There might have been a time where Naruto would have cared about a couple of the looks they got, but now he couldn’t have cared less. Their opinions couldn’t stop love. 

_ Let them stare,  _ He smiled, looking into Sasuke’s eyes as they danced to the music.  _ They’re probably jealous. _

Naruto pulled Sasuke into a hug as the song drew to a close, again, not caring what anyone thought. “I love you Sasuke.” 

“I love you too Naru,” Sasuke kissed the top of his forehead.

Quiet whispers, with the spirit of battle cries. 

 

It was a perfect night. After Prom ended they both declined the offers to go to any after parties, deciding instead to go for a walk in the park.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” Sasuke smiled up at the sky. It really was a perfect night, not even too cold. The stars were incredible. 

Naruto smiled at him. Months ago, Sasuke probably would never have even noticed something like that. “Not as much as you.” 

Sasuke laughed, pulling him into a hug. “I love you Naru.” 

“Love you too Sasuke.”


	35. Epilouge

Epilogue

 

Sasuke smiled, turning to Naruto with a hand on his shoulder. “I’ll be right back okay?” 

Naruto turned, frowning but nodded. “Okay…” 

Sasuke hurried over to the small booth he had seen and quickly made his purchase before heading back to Naruto. He grinned, holding up the rainbow flag. Naruto’s face practically lit up. 

Sasuke pulled him close, pulling the flag around them like a blanket as they watched the parade go past. He planted a small kiss on his forehead, caught up with an almost irrational happiness in the moment. “I love you Naru.” 

Naruto looked up, their eyes meeting. And both of them found themselves able to believe again, really believe again, that things were alright. Better than alright. “I love you too Sasuke.” Naruto finally said, pulling him into a small, gentle, kiss. 

And they cheered along with the crowd as rainbow flags were raised all around. Caught up in the moment, they were both to a point of irrational happiness. Surrounded by so much love and their love for each other, they couldn’t help but smile, really smile. 

_ No matter what comes in the future,  _ Sasuke thought, holding Naruto close.  _ I will always love you. If life pulls us apart one day, I pray we find each other again. You have given me a second chance to start hoping, believing, that life is good. You have given me hope. Thank you.  _

  
  


Naruto and Sasuke will return in Sun and Moon: Where Crossroads Meet (Prequel to Second Hopes) Summer 2018

Naruto and Sasuke will return in Love Again (Sequel to Second Hopes) Fall 2019


	36. Afterword

Afterword

Well, this story sure has come quite some ways. This started out with nothing more than a vague idea of “what if Naruto characters were in marching band” and now it’s here. Again I’d like to say thank you to my co-author on this, Konkyatto. 

And a thank you to you, for reading. I hope you enjoyed. If you did enjoy reading you might enjoy reading my other Naruto and Sasuke story, You Are My Sunshine. Like Second Hopes that story is planned to be part of a trilogy, and the prequel to You Are My Sunshine will come out this fall.

And for now, this is the end. Until this fall, goodbye

 

(And here’s a drawing Konkyatto did if some of the characters in Second Hopes started a rock band. Naruto and Sasuke, Gaara and Lee, Keira and Kotone, and Kiba and Kankuro.)


End file.
